#One Life After Another Forevermore

[ghostxrose]

𝑶𝒏𝒆 𝑳𝒊𝒇𝒆 𝑨𝒇𝒕𝒆𝒓 𝑨𝒏𝒐𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓, 𝑭𝒐𝒓𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒎𝒐𝒓𝒆 | 𝑩𝒂𝒌𝒖𝒈𝒐 𝑲𝒂𝒕𝒔𝒖𝒌𝒊 𝒙 𝑹𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒆𝒓

Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Part Five (final)

Note ~ Happy holidays, Lovelies! I'm sorry that it has taken a few days for me to post the final part, I've been busy with work and adulting, haha! Anyway, I hope that you all are excited for this finale to this fic and love it as much as I do! It will be the shortest part yet at barely 900 words but in my opinion it came out so adorable, though I am biased, haha! Well, enough with my rambling, enjoy the read My Wonderful Lovelies! <3

Tags/Warnings ~ Fem!Reader, Reincarnation, Soulmates, Hurt/Comfort, Angst, Fluff, Emotional, Temporary Character Deaths, Depictions of Injuries, Potentially Triggering Content, No Use of Y/N, Hurts So Good (let me know if I should tag anything else <3)

You were nervously playing with the end of your long dark braided hair as you walked up to the door of the classroom. You still couldn’t believe that you had gotten into U.A., let alone the Hero Course. You smoothed over your uniform then slid the door to Class 1-A open.

Your eyes swept over the few students already in the classroom then you looked up at the board for the seating chart. When you looked back to the sea of desks and located where yours was, you saw a tall blue-haired boy sternly lecturing an ash-blonde boy sitting at the desk behind yours.

You quietly made your way over to your desk and slid into the seat, making the blue-haired boy halt his lecture towards the blonde behind you. You turned in your seat to face them and gave them a shy smile when you saw that both were staring at you.

The blue-haired boy was staring at you in what seemed to be recognition but you weren’t quite sure since you had no idea who he was. But the ash-blonde boy was glaring at you intently and you couldn’t figure out what you had done wrong.

“Hi, I’m..” You introduced yourself shyly, your violet eyes darting between the two nervously.

The blue-haired boy gave an.. enthusiastic.. greeting while the blonde just made some sort of dismissive noise and turned his head to look out the window. You felt a pang of something hit you in the chest briefly before turning around to face the front of the classroom again.

After the teacher had come in and introduced himself, he had your class change into P.E. uniforms and then meet out on a baseball field. You listened as he explained what you would be doing and what the purpose of the test was before he called up a student to demonstrate one of the exercises.

“Bakugo..” Was all you heard your teacher say before your ears tuned out the rest.

You watched the crimson-eyed ash-blonde walk up to the teacher and grab the ball before moving to the pitching mound. It was like everything happened in slow motion as you watched Bakugo wind up his arm and throw the ball.

Not even the explosion from the boy’s hand could pull you out of the daze that you had apparently gone into. Your eyes met his as he walked back to stand with the rest of your classmates and you found something so familiar within all of the crimson.

You went through the series of Quirk tests completely absent from reality. It’s like you were on autopilot and out of your body until you heard Aizawa Sensei’s words dismissing your class. The other girls from your class had picked up on your strange behavior and tried to make sure that you were feeling okay. They wore worried looks on their faces as you all changed in the locker room and made your way back to the classroom.

By the end of the day, you had still felt like you weren’t back in your body. Or rather, you felt like something was missing, maybe? You couldn’t pinpoint what was going on, you just knew that you had felt off.

As you walked towards the school gates to leave, you spotted a familiar head of ash-blonde hair. You moved faster to catch up to him, unsure of why your brain thought that he would have any answers as to what was wrong with you.

“Bakugo, hey, wait a sec-” You called out as you reached for his hand.

As soon as your skin made contact with his it was like a movie started playing on fast-forward in front of your eyes, right in your mind. Flashes of different worlds, and different realities, different settings filled your vision and made you feel unsteady on your feet. Along with the flashes came feelings; unthinkable heartbreak, overwhelming joy, unimaginable physical and emotional pain, peace.

Finally, your vision cleared and you felt tears dripping down your face. You looked up at Bakugo and saw his wide shiny eyes and almost unreadable face. You felt his warm hand gripping yours almost too tightly.

Suddenly, Katsuki’s arms were wrapped tightly around you and you automatically reciprocated the action.

“My Love.” You murmured into his shoulder.

“My Violet.” His raspy voice whispered into the crook of your neck.

…

…

…

Every lifetime after that one began like that; forgetting your past lives, finding each other, remembering, then living out your lives until you died of old age.

You always passed away peacefully and always in each others’ arms.

And every time, the Goddess of Fate smiled with pride for the both of you.

You and him would never know it but the Goddess of Fate had never laughed at your shortcomings, had never found joy in taking you away from each other so early within your past lives.

The Goddess of Fate had just done what she does best; tied your souls to each other, put you through as many trials as you needed to prove your compatibility, then gave you both the peace you deserved.

You and him were never star-crossed lovers tied together as a joke, you were always meant to be true soulmates.

You and he were always meant to be Eternal Lovers...

One life after another, forevermore.

Author's Note ~ And we have reached the end of this fic *wipes tears* I loved writing this fic so much. The amount of emotion that I poured into this fic is something that I have trouble with doing again now. It was a special kind of inspiration that I had felt when writing this fic and I crave to have it back to be honest.

Even though they won't compare to how this fic turned out, let me know if I should post my other fics here! I would love to get some tips or comments about what I could do better! I don't want to be a one hit wonder, you know? I want to share my works and have them be good enough for people to really enjoy. So, please let me know what you think!

I love and appreciate every single one of you, Lovelies! <3

Tag List ~ @damnirina @queenpiranhadon

Divider Credit ~ @archonfurina

[oathkeeper-of-tarth]

I have all the time in the world. How about you?

There is a theme to Aylin's threats and vows of vengeance that I've noticed and that I want to share.

Do what you will. I cannot prevent you. But you know as well as I, I will come for you. One day.

That one, for example, is for Balthazar, while she is imprisoned.

I cannot prevent you. But I can advise you. Be careful to whom you yoke your fate. One day, when he is severed from me, Ketheric will die. I will not. And when I am freed, I will remember whose recompense to claim.

Did you expect me to beg? To cry? To plead? For what. I accept my fate - for now. But the life of a divine is longer than you can fathom, Sharran. And this cold chapter will close, one day.

And those are for you, when you've yet to harm her, when she's still only warning you off. But then, if you choose to try to kill her, like so many before you:

Was it everything you hoped for? Was it sweet, Sharran, to murder a paladin of Selûne - her daughter - her sword? Congratulations - your mistress Shar will write your name on her hand. And I? I will come for you. When the time is right.

The next bit depends on your character's gender:

When your sons are grown and your beard is long and wiry; when you cannot hold your nightly water and your nose grows as long as your weary, weary days… When your daughters are grown and your chin sprouts whiskers dark - when your teeth are yellow as corn and your sleep grows short and your days are long and weary, so weary… When your children are grown and your eyes are weak; when your nose grows as long as your weary, weary days…

Ultimately, your fate will be the same:

That is when this immortal will visit you, Sharran. That is when I will show you what it is to be afraid.

All these long-term promises of one day, coupled with inevitability.

I find it so striking that most of Aylin's threats include her flaunting and flexing her immortality (as well as her flawless, long memory) over whoever has wronged her.

Present your weapon, soldier. Plunge it into the Nightsong. I cannot stop you. But know this: I never forget a face. HAH! Are you afraid, Sharran? Do you rattle and jump at the realisation that an immortal has your face emblazoned in her mind forevermore?

Everything is but a passing inconvenience to her, she claims, even a century of imprisonment and torment. Outlasting, outliving - that is simply what she does and what she chooses to intimidate with. Promising to wait until you are old and decrepit, until after you've experienced all the vagaries of age that she never will, leaving her sword hanging over your head throughout the entire miserable lifespan that she has permitted you to have.

Then, if you wrong her in a very heinous way, there's the extreme one of outliving not only you, but killing and extinguishing your entire bloodline in order to obliterate every trace of you from existence:

WHEN I AM FREE, I WILL DESTROY YOU! I WILL MURDER YOU, AND YOUR CHILDREN, AND THEIR CHILDREN BESIDE! I will rip this world apart, plank and beam, until every iota of your being is scalded by my light. This is my promise. This is my vow.

Over and over, Aylin builds her oaths of vengeance on the foundations of an utter, even proud, certainty that she will see her foe end, one way or another, due to her nature and the simple fact of her own endlessness. This is the well she keeps coming back to.

And I find all of this, this consistent insistence on it, so striking and ironic, because one of her other main emotional threads is being thoroughly enraptured by and devoted to and just so completely in love with a mortal. One who will age and die and pass into memory just like all the targets of her rage - if I think of Isobel when I re-read all of that dialogue up there, it seems to cut both ways so deeply. But then there's the extra element that every single one of these is spoken when she either knows or is (incorrectly) convinced that Isobel is dead. Isobel, who didn't get to grow old, and who is both an anchor to humanity and a very painful reminder of the truth of Aylin's situation being twofold.

Aylin will outlast what she hates, yes, but she will outlast what she loves as well.

[mikareo]

“ ࣭⸰ ★ HE'S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU . . . ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ 呪術廻戦 ; gojo satoru x fem reader (1k)

⊹ ⠀⠀ valentine's day is approaching; and with a valentine comes love...or for worse...heartbreak.

contains; gojo satoru x fem reader, angst, mentions of fluff idk, there’s some swearing i think author's note; happy (almost) valentine's,, i’m projecting

1 day, 9 hours, and 47 minutes.

your last conversation wasn't anything out of the ordinary. there was no dry spell. no plateau. no failure to communicate. just you and satoru, plus the typical banter, talking about something as simple as what you were planning on making for dinner; to be more precise, what you were trying to make for dinner. you're a pretty awful cook according to him.

everything seemed to be going so well...really well...almost perfectly well— and with valentine's day right around the corner, you'd instinctively assumed that he'd ask you to be his. instinct is a difficult emotion, though. is it even an emotion? you're not quite sure, but your heart believes it is. your heart— which is practically pounding out of your chest at the current moment, stretching your skin, eager to feel the limitless fresh air and freedom that comes with floating on cloud 9— instinctively wants to believe satoru is your soulmate. you love him don't you? is the answer yes? it should be no.

you've known him for...what? four months? four months of your twenty years of life is seemingly small. that's only one point six-seven percent of your entire lifetime...one point six-seven percent of your life that you wish you could relive forevermore.

...he isn't going to text you back is he?

2 days, 2 hours, and 15 minutes.

each second passing is another flicker of hope that misses the candle wick. instead of lighting the path that leads to your eventual relationship, it lights a fire beneath your feet. your socks feel warm. there's coal beneath them. hot, burning coal withering away the sense of feel in your toes; breathing in the aroma of heartbreak until it becomes a roaring fire that consumes all of you.

why is he doing this? what did you do wrong? you haven't done anything wrong. he's just a man. a man who can't seem to stop playing with your heart.

you can hear his voice in the back of your mind. the part of your mind that connects to your heart. "can you facetime, right now? i'm having a bad day and i just want to see your face." he had to have meant that. "you don't need to apologize for talking over me, i love hearing what you have to say." a guy wouldn't just say that to say that. "don't be too hard on yourself, i know you'll figure everything out becuase you're you. you always know what to do." it couldn't have all been bullshit.

it can't have been bullshit.

because if that's all it was, then you're just a fool in love.

and fools in love are no better than clowns.

3 days, 14 hours, and 22 minutes.

you did what you hate doing. the thing that makes you want to scream into your pillow at the mere thought. the very thing that screams desperation and neediness and clinginess and insecurity all in one. you sent another message.

in the past, you've never had feelings strong enough to elicit such a response. your heart hasn't tied itself to another person's with a red satin bow. the fated string of fate hadn't found you yet. it allowed you to maintain a stable head and remain grounded with no hopes of love on your radar. you hadn't yet learned how to fly; until that day you met satoru and suddenly you had a hundred pilot lessons lined up day-after-day.

it was so easy being with him. everything was so easy.

for the first time ever you had no doubts. you weren't afraid of waking up one morning to find him gone. disappeared. nonexistent. you full-heartedly believed he'd never leave; and you believed he reciprocated those thoughts. now, though...now you may never know what bits and pieces he reciprocated— because your plane crashed. turbulence flew beneath the wings and drove the flight off course. the oxygen masks bellowed down upon the passengers, every seat being filled with your pounding heartbeats, and each and every one of them blew out of the window with no parachute. he didn't even try to cushion the fall.

4 days, 1 hour, and 39 minutes.

if there's one message you never expected to receive, it's surely 'seen 14 hours ago'.

you'd given him space and assumed he'd been busy with a million other things and hadn't had any time to send you a quick message. your last text wasn't even anything out of the ordinary, just a quick "are you okay?", you think that's pretty reasonable. it's reasonable, isn't it?

something could be seriously wrong with him. why else would he leave you on read? he's never done this before. usually, you're the one who's more distant between the two of you. that's how your relationship began, after all. he'd send five texts in comparison to your two; which later evolved into five rivaling five, and now to zero rivaling two. the scales have tipped. how do you rebalance them?

you trust satoru. there must be a perfectly good explanation for this odd irregularity that's occurring in your otherwise perfect relationship. after all, all of your friends love him— they think he's the greatest catch of the 21st century. he's never done anything in the past to warrant such strange behavior. this is simply a difficult week for him...and you'll be there whenever he's ready to vent.

5 days, 22 hours, and 7 minutes.

a broken heart isn't for the weak...but unfortunately, you're not one of the stronger warriors.

he's at another girl's birthday party. he hasn't messaged you back in almost six days...and he's with another girl? celebrating her? he could be holding her close and you wouldn't even know, because god knows he wouldn't tell you. he won't even say good morning anymore. he won't even answer your fucking three word message that you sent out of desperation and concern for his well being. instead, he's at the club with his friends, getting drunk and taking shots, having the time of his life; and you're sitting in your room watching his social media stories...believing that everything that went wrong is all your fault.

but it's not your fault.

it's not your fault you fell for someone like that.

someone like satoru gojo.

[devilfic]

❝friends of the web❞

plot: you have a fear of spiders, but you've made a promise to work past it. peter thinks your determination is really quite adorable. pairing: tasm!peter parker x gn!reader. cw: fluff, humor, established relationship, spiders (not graphic), reader has arachnophobia but is being so brave about it, based on the poem "ten legs, eight broken" by I, e on tiktok because it fundamentally changed the way I interact with small bugs forevermore. words: 1.2k.

a/n: I have had pretty bad arachnophobia my entire life and after reading ten legs, eight broken a while back, it convinced me to start saving little spiders I find in my house. this fic is 100% based on how that ends up going every single time. minus peter parker coming to save the day

He's careful, stomach coiled tight to control his breathing. One hand is delicately pinching a bolt with tweezers, the other holding his webshooter frighteningly still. One wrong move would trigger the suspension, and about four hours' worth of fluid refill would end up all over his research notes. He has to be slow. He lowers the tweezers another half inch.

Gently, the bolt's thread catches and he releases the breath he'd been holding. In that same moment, you shout and his tweezers slip.

It's the feeling of webs spraying him in the face that he registers first, their tendrils catching onto his glasses and eyelashes and lips. Then it's your rushed breathing, the pumping of your heart nearly beating out of your chest. He doesn't feel a tingle along his spine but your shout jolts Peter out of his spell. In an instant, he's batting away the webs and throwing himself out of his office with enough velocity to take down a wall. He's expecting scorpions, vultures, lizards, his hearing zeroing in on you, and-

-and he turns the corner and there's you, crouched on the floor, hands cupped in front of you—cocooning something. "Hey, hey, hey, whoa, whoa." Peter's eyes flit around the room, looking for the threat his senses ought to have picked up on by now, and kneels beside you. He focuses on your hands and your complete and utter lack of urgency. "What's going on?"

You glance to the side, so quick he doesn't even think you register the panic on his face, "Pete, thank God. Can you talk to this thing for me?"

You move your hand and the other breathing thing in the room becomes apparent. A spider, barely the size of a crumb, is crawling over mountains of carpet thread. It's moving quickly but in circles, clearly confounded by the terrain. Peter looks at you. He drags each syllable out as he asks, "What is happening?"

You shift and Peter shifts with you, keeping an eye on the spider, "This thing- this spider is such a jackass."

"Yeah?"

"I'm trying to get him outside and he won't go."

You've got a flier for Pilates in the Park clenched in one hand, while the other is cautiously putting a wall between the spider and the abyss under your sofa, a place where even Peter dares not go. "Why don't you just kill it?"

Clearly that was the wrong thing to say. You look horrified at him as you answer, "I can't kill him!"

"Do we- are we sure it's a him? Have you decided he's a him?"

"I made a promise to myself that I would stop killing."

"I don't think... okay, what is going on here?"

You struggle to explain and focus on the spider at the same time, "It's a resolution I made for the new year. That even though I'm terrified of these things, I won't kill them anymore because... because they're living beings just like me." Peter watches you bite your lip, a twinge of pity sewn into the divot between your furrowed brows, "So I'm putting them outside whenever I see one... if only they would stop being jackasses about it."

Peter half-laughs, half-sighs. The little spider crawling around on the ground is none the wiser to your inner peril, "This isn't just because your boyfriend is, like, 1/3 spider, is it? I won't take it personally if you hit him with a shoe."

You snort and place your flier in front of the escaping spider, watching it crawl over the word "yoga" before making a u-turn for the carpet, "Of course not, my spider overlord."

You try to scoop up the spider again but every time you lift the paper, it dives off the other side and back into the carpet. "How long does this usually take?" Peter asks. He sits back on his ass, propping up a knee to rest his arm on.

"Ten minutes at best. If I don't lose them."

"Hm. And this works for you?"

You pout up at him, scooping up the spider again and watching it fly off once more, "I usually manage to get them outside, I'll have you know."

"And the screaming?"

"I never said it was a peaceful process."

"So, let me get this straight," Peter leans into you, "you spot the spider, you grab the nearest piece of paper, you try to get the spider on the paper, and then you...?"

"Scream and run until I make it to the window."

"Why- why the screaming?"

You wince, trying not to lose the bug in the carpet, "Because I'm scared they'll touch me." Your boyfriend tickles his fingers along your arm and you shiver, swatting him with your free hand.

After another failed attempt, Peter places his hand in front of the spider's path and it crawls into his palm to get to the kitchen. Before it can cross over into tiled territory, it's forced to a sudden stop, and Peter takes advantage.

It takes him three strides to get to the living room window, yank it open, and release the spiderling into the wild.

You're standing behind him with a look of frustration on your face, even though your shoulders have finally sagged with relief, "How'd you convince him to sit in your hand like that?"

"I didn't. Sticky hands." Peter wiggles all his fingers at you, amused.

"Wh- that's it? Do they not usually listen to you or something?" You grab one of his hands and quickly realize he's using that ability on you this time. He's got you stuck in a handhold.

"I can't remember when I ever said I could talk to spiders."

"I mean, it seems like a pretty fair assumption," you grumble, trying to shake his hand away before giving in, "they put their juices in you after all."

"Why would you say that?"

"Thanks for the help, by the way. I'm still... getting used to not panicking when I see them."

Peter raises his other hand to your hair and gives you a kiss on the temple, smiling against your skin, "You are so, so, so brave."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. I mean, it's pretty brave to show mercy to something you fear, right? You could've killed it or asked me to do it, but you didn't. You wanted it to live."

"It doesn't mean to scare me," you bring your intertwined hands up to your mouth and press a kiss to his knuckles, "I'd want it to take pity on me if it was the other way around."

"I think the spiders will appreciate that."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

"Then why do they give me such a hard time?"

"Well, you're so scared of them that you don't even realize they're just as scared of you. You gotta make 'em like you, you know?"

"Got any tips for that?"

Peter guides his free hand to your waist, rocking you side to side, "Hm. Buy them sushi. Take them to a midnight showing of Night of the Living Dead. Tell him you think his nerdy rambling after the movie is sexy..." You giggle into Peter's chest and his heart swells, "Don't laugh! It worked on me."

You tilt your head up and he steals a kiss without hesitation, making you stumble on what you say next, "How about you just come let them out for me next time, hm?"

"And if I'm not around?"

"...make me a super scientific spider catching gadget?"

Peter hooks his hands underneath your thighs and hikes you up around his waist, "I'll make you one if you refill my web fluid for me."

"You can fill me with your web fluid."

"Okay. I'm putting you in time out, freak."

taglist: @yikes-buddy @alexxavicry @theclassicvinyldragon @marina-and-the-memes

[pathetic-gamer]

Can you say more on The Burning Wheel? The information on the site doesn’t distinguish it much from other TTRPGs that I can tell, aside from being a D6 system. What makes it unique and worth playing? (You don’t have to provide a huge rundown haha I’m just curious!)

Sure! I tried to keep this short and failed miserably, but I'd be happy to expound even more upon specific things later, if people want more :)

(Please note that, as with any ttrpg, it would be hard to claim any of the things mentioned here are wholly original to The Burning Wheel. It would be even harder to claim that no other systems have used these mechanics or philosophies in the 20 years since The Burning Wheel came out. I am not going to claim either of those things - its the combination of them and the play experience they have resulted in for me that make it unique, so that's the angle from which I'm writing this post.)

So. why is it worth playing? How is it different?

I could talk about the skill learning system, the war rules codex, the whole concept of versus tests vs bloody versus tests. But to me, there are two main ways that it stands out from other systems: its treatment of role-play as a mechanism, and the overall philosophy behind the game's design, including the concept of setting clear expectations.

(using section headers to break up the text lol)

How it uses role-play:

The most obvious thing to point out is that there's a whole set of encounter mechanics for social situations or debates (Circles checks, Duel of Wits, etc.) - sort of the epitome of crunchy role play. But thats not what I'm getting at! What I'm getting is the fact that good role play is integral to the way the game functions.

Let's go back, all the way to character creation: When you're burning a character, you selecting life paths (page to squire to knight, etc.) with their associated skills and traits, then tie them in a pretty bow with beliefs and instincts to guide the character's actions. All of these things feed into each other to make a complete character. Easy! Familiar! We all know how to make a character, even if the numbers and labels are different!

What really matters to this engine once you're playing is whether the character you're acting as matches what you built. If it doesn't, the rules nudge you to redefine your character until it does through systems of rewards, penalties, and consequences. You are rewarded for sticking to and acting on your traits, beliefs, and instincts through different types of points distributed and voted on by fellow players, which can be used to alter the course of events or turn the tide of a bad situation later on. If you're not living up to a trait, on the other hand, you can lose it and all its benefits. (Took the fortitude trait, but ran from trouble one too many times? tough luck! the other players voted to take away that trait and now you can't call on it in moments of peril.) The beliefs and traits of a single character can end up at odds with each other, resulting in characters having to make choices that in other systems might seem insignificant or carry few lasting consequences, but here may alter the function of your character.

It's not all punitive measures, btw! One of my characters caused problems for everyone else by refusing to put away a weapon when someone else was in danger, playing off of an instinct that states he draws his weapon whenever his master does. After the session, another player suggested everyone consider nominating the Brave trait for him the next time we update them. As a character-type trait, it has no effect when rolling dice but does mean that henceforth and forevermore, anyone who interacts with him will notice a sense of bravery. Delightful!!

Also, the beliefs of different characters are practically guaranteed to stray from one another at some point, which is the primary source of inter-PC conflict. Because the mechanics of the game encourage and reward sticking to your beliefs or following your stated instincts even when it makes things significantly harder or causes problems, you're much more inclined to do it. As someone who is terrible at not slipping back into the same kind of character over and over again, I think this fucking rules.

I'm playing with a group of people I've been gaming with for almost five years, and this has opened the way for much richer dynamics between our characters than any of the other systems we've played, in part because as players we're less interested in acting on concensus to drive the plot forward. Working as one unit simply isn't the goal, and if it was, we would play a different system that encourages and rewards that.

the game's philosophy, aka setting intentions and also reading rules:

Now we're starting to get at the philosophy behind the game's design: It believes you have to know why you're playing burning wheel instead of literally any other game. This isn't a system you play on accident. It's admittedly a complicated game with a LOT of rules. It asks for a huge amount of engagement from all of the players, not just the GM - something like inter-PC conflict can only work well if everyone is on the same page (figuratively, but also literally lol) and ready to help adjudicate rules, ask for tests, discuss intentions, etc. Dream scenario for a chronic rules lawyer lol.

Obviously any game will be more fun if everyone has actually learned the rules before they start playing, but this is one where it's extremely difficult (if not impossible) to play if most players haven't learned them, and deeply rewarding if they have. It really operates on the expectation that everyone is putting in work, and everyone has respect for the time and effort the others are bringing to the table.

It's hard to put a finger on how this all impacts play other than the obvious elegence of People Knowing What Theyre Doing, but on a purely emotional and meta level, knowing that everyone is investing so much time and effort to play a game with you is just.. idk, it feels special and makes the time itself feel even more valuable. In that sense, the satisfaction of playing the game isn't coming from the game itself, but is still shaped by it.

(In my mind, this is the #1 reason to try the game, but as @thydungeongal alluded to yesterday, finding people willing and able to do it is also the #1 hurdle to, like, actually having a good time. it would be completely miserable otherwise.)

Also, for a game that does not boast a collaborative nature the way some others do, it is honestly pretty fuckin collaborative lol. I don't know that this was Luke Crane's intention in designing the game, but closing out sessions by going through and grading everyone's work and giving each other glorified gold stars, you will inevitably end up discussing and dissecting things, learning from people's character work, and seeing where and how you can improve individually and as a group. It creates a table culture that values honest expressions of discomfort or dissatisfaction, and also of appreciation and celebration. It's after-care. It leads naturally into setting intentions and expectations for the next session. It just feels really nice!!!

That's obviously a table culture that can be cultivated anyway, and it's a practice my group has learned to be very intentional about facilitating, but it's just interesting how The Burning Wheel of all systems manages to support that. I think that's what the website means when it says playing this changes how you play other rpgs lol

So yeah, idk how much more to say and also I'm sooooooo so eepy and was like an hour late for work, so its a weird brain day. but there you go lol

[espace--positif]

This image from the third Elden Ring Book of Knowledge on SOTE has been circulating, and people are citing it as proof that Radahn was a willing participant in Miquella's plans. I don't think these words can serve as definitive proof, and I maintain that Radahn was controlled by Miquella. Here's why.

Image credits: @/Siofra_Mariner on Twitter

To me, the words "their order" and "their cause" don't prove that Radahn is united with Miquella by choice. These deliberate words make me think of Leda's group, Those United in Common Cause, who end up at odds with each other when Miquella's charm inevitably breaks. I think that that very same influence is being alluded to here, with Miquella having used his influence to control Radahn and join him to his cause.

The words "Miquella will intervene once again" imply that Miquella has to fight against some form of natural current, has to change the course of fate, in order to succeed (or try to succeed) at defeating the Lord of the Old Order; to me, the first time he intervened and changed the course of fate is referred to in the first paragraph, where they detail his resurrection of Radahn's body, free of scarlet rot. The text also refers to Radahn's "deserved rest" - again implying that Miquella's resurrection and use of Radahn is somewhat unnatural and morally wrong. If Radahn truly were a willing participant, I don't think that it would have been referred to this way. The story of one intervening with another's fate ironically occurs earlier in the base game, with Radahn stilling Ranni's fate by holding back the stars.

Next, I want to talk about, guess what, more wording.

"Miquella's wish to instill Radahn as his Promised Consort upon his ascent to godhood, a promise he made to Radahn in their childhood."

Note that the wish is Miquella's wish, not Miquella and Radahn's wish, not their collective wish. The word promise is also interesting if we look at the way Miquella uses the word in the DLC dialogue, and towards whom it's directed.

"I promise you, a thousand year voyage, guided by compassion."

Miquella says this to the Tarnished when they are grabbed. Two grabs, and the Tarnished gets their "Heart Stolen", charmed by Miquella forevermore. The Tarnished is resistant, and this is one way through which Miquella deals with resistance.

To Miquella, promises and vows are not shared agreements, but they are the way he enacts his will and influence upon others. They are unidirectional, assured, and a means to an end. His compassion extends to all, but strips all free will, and Radahn's is no exception.

A few notes that didn't fit into any of the above points:

This is my interpretation of the game and the text, and I always enjoy reading other people's interpretations. I think that's the great thing about Elden Ring's ambiguous lore; there can be many readings, and we'll really never know which are right.

I'm very biased when it comes to the topic of Miquella's desecration of both Radahn and Mohg, one in body, and one in soul - I feel like it really cemented how wrong Miquella ended up turning after abandoning all those aspects of himself in the Land of Shadow, and I felt all kinds of icky and sad when I finished the DLC because of this. St. Trina's being discarded and her death was devastating, especially when she was one of the most human and compassionate characters in Elden Ring, granting respite to all the frenzied merchants out of true compassion.

I do believe that Miquella is a victim of the cycle, though, and that he lost himself in more ways than one after witnessing what happened to his mother. To Miquella, the only way to make people stop doing horrible things is to stop them from doing anything of their own volition at all. In theory, it works. But it is so sad. I'm reminded of Melina's dialogue when you choose to inherit the frenzied flame: "However ruined this world has become, however mired in torment and despair, life endures. Births continue. There is beauty in that, is there not?" I sympathize with Miquella, I really do. I understand that he did all this because he not find any alternatives. The world being comprised of cyclical happenings that one person cannot fix is a recurring theme in Souls in general, and Miquella is just another victim of another cycle, which ends up begetting more violence, much like the violence enacted on Marika which prompted Miquella to try and fix things in the first place.

That’s it! I really needed to get this off my chest, and it definitely didn’t fit into a tweet (which is where all the discourse is happening lol). If you made it to the bottom of this yap, I'd love to hear your thoughts on this as well! Thanks for reading my ramblings <3

[whenlostinthedarkness]

Tis The Damn Season | Part 2

Ellie Williams x Reader

Photo credit: [ x ]

Summary: After your unexpected run-in with your ex girlfriend Ellie, you take a trip down memory lane and explore your spots in Jackson. The next morning, Your mom starts to make a miraculous recovery which leaves you with some hope. Come nightfall, that ex girlfriend makes yet another surprise appearance, and one that you can’t ignore.

Rating: M [mentions of past relationship, mentions of an ill mother, & angst w/reader & Ellie.]

WC: 4.7k

A/N: Sorry that part 2 took forever to come out. I’ve had lotssss happening in my personal life and creating anything was hard, but I hope you enjoy this part 2!

Taglist: @bready101 @onlinelesbo

Part One | Masterlist | How you can help Palestine

——————-

You were left alone again. Except a new feeling had crept up on you that hadn’t been there before. It could be relief from getting your first run-in with your ex, or a shaken emotion from seeing someone who was like a dark ghost in your mind. You couldn’t put your finger on it. All you could think about was the brick building that sat directly in front of you.

Before the outbreak, one could call this place a cafe of some sort. Since those were in severely few supply nowadays, it was more of a dinner, cafe, and hang-out spot all combined into one.

A lot of teens and young adults would come here to do school work, just have a chat, or grab a bite to eat. You and Ellie had claimed this spot as your first romantic public endeavor.

Without much thought, your feet moved until you stood directly down the center of the bay windows. Your reflection shone as you moved your face closer to the windows so you could get a proper look at the place. The only light illuminating the inside was one cast from the string lights that hung above, however, you could still make out the familiar mixed-matched tables and chairs that held so many memories of so many people.

And then, you saw it. That same roughened, wooden table you knew from your teenagehood. It was tucked away in the farthest right corner-one that you remember picking on purpose so you and Ellie could have some sort of privacy within a social place.

At this very place was where Ellie held your hand for the first time, where you and her took a pocket knife to the wood of the table and carved your initials inside of a heart to be engrained forevermore.

The last memory, however, was a bitter one. One that had you moving as far away from the glass as one stride of your legs could get you. It was like you saw a ghost of the past. She lingered everywhere and stained every wall in that place in the best and worst way possible.

You’d rather not reminisce on the day when you ended things with her, all because Ellie, “didn’t know what she wanted” when it came to the both of you or life in general. It’s funny how you chose that very table and chairs to end what started in those exact seats.

You hadn’t realized how cold you were until your concentration was broken by the chattering of your teeth. Your eyes glanced downwards and caught a glimpse of your red raw hands. You figured you should head home.

As your cold legs and feet backtracked along the path, you couldn’t shake the image of Ellie’s face that you’d seen only moments ago. She still looked like Ellie, but different. The adult years aged their way onto her face and bones like expensive wine. You thought adulthood suited her very well. You felt yourself analyzing this “new” Ellie your entire stroll home.

Soon enough, your hand was opening the door and enclosing you in the warmth of your home..well, your old home. Slowly, your cold feet shuffled along until you were in bed with closed eyes and a mind that finally was able to drift into the unconscious world.

A couple of blocks away, Ellie herself had just gotten into her bed. That is, once she was able to pry herself from the window that, just so happened to have a crystal clear view of your route home.

The both of you went to bed with thoughts of the other swirling like rainstorms.

—

The sun shone through the window much too soon in your opinion. Your hand shielded your eyes as you picked up your watch from the table side bed; you groaned as you saw the two hands on the clock.

Though you did eventually get some sleep the night before, it was a small amount that still had your eyes stinging and puffy and your brain in an eternal fog. However, your mother was on your mind and you knew you wouldn’t be able to go back to sleep just to catch a couple of extra hours when instead you could be spending that time with your mother at her bedside.

You were eager to get up and outfit your body in proper warm clothes, all while a pot of coffee boiled on the single electric stove top. Once the dark tan liquid was poured into a thermos and your work boots were strapped on your feet, you set off for what lay beyond the front door.

The sun rose moments ago as the streets were only littered with a couple of people who were either on top of their horses with rifles slung over their shoulders, or those who were on foot, busy getting the chores for the morning done.

Familiar faces greeted with sympathetic looks as you journeyed back to the infirmary. They didn’t have to start any pity-driven conversations with you for it to be clear that every single person you were coming across in this god-forsaken town was seeing you as fragile. You despised it.

Being fragile, for you, meant being weak and you’d go to the ends of the earth to prove that you were anything but weak. One could suppose that being meek or non-self-sufficient was one of your biggest fears.

The sun shone through the smudged windows, bringing a bright sunny light to this dreary place. A wave of antiseptic and gauze tingled inside your nostrils, bringing a weird sort of nostalgia. You caught the eye of the nurse from the night before, and she quickly had you follow her lead as she walked you down to your mother's cot.

“How’s she doing?”

The nurse tried her best to put on a happy face, but it looked so forced, it was impossible to see it as truth. “I checked on her a couple of hours ago and she was…, she seems to be the same as the last time you saw her”.

You nodded slowly as the heaviness of your mother's health remained on your chest.

The both of you passed rows and rows of empty and filled cots that were enveloped in stained curtains that hung from orange, rusted hooks attached to the ceiling. It felt dystopian to have such a bright sun shining down on people who were actively fighting to stay alive. You just hoped the same fate wasn’t stricken upon your mother- and it seemed that your hope was a force to be reckoned with.

There your mother was, sitting up with her back resting against the cold brick wall. She still looked ill, but that corpse-like appearance and the greyness of her skin was fading into a more natural tone. She seemed alive.

You couldn’t hold back your joy as you squealed, “Mom!”, and came to sit on the floor next to her bed.

The nurse stood with mouth agape as your mother sat her hand on top of yours; you enveloped your hand with hers almost immediately.

“How are you doing Mom?”

Her voice was rasped, but her smile was genuine as she told you she was fine and found much more importance in asking how you were doing and what you had been up to. At this moment, it was obvious your fear of weakness had come from somewhere or rather from someone.

Day turned into sunset and sunset turned into the grey of night. Your mother’s eyes were drooping the later it got and you knew she was pushing herself only because she was enjoying the time she was spending with you. With a little bit of convincing, you were able to get your mother tucked away in bed. Your lips pressed a delicate kiss to her forehead as you whispered sweet words into her ear. The night nurse herself couldn’t help but smile at the interaction between the two of you.

“I’ll come to find you if anything changes”, she said softly. You nodded before giving your mother one last look. A surge of joy and hope was alive in your heart- one that you hadn’t felt since..well, a long time.

As you exited the infirmary, your eyes looked up to the night sky. You noticed how the stars were brighter tonight than they had been the night prior. You knew Ellie would be looking up at the sky tonight in awe-you could picture it perfectly and you hated it. You hated how it had become a habit for you to look up to the nighttime sky any time you were given the oportunity, all because of her.

Thankfully, your thoughts of her were quickly interrupted.

“We’ve got to stop meeting like this,” that all too familiar, deep voice hummed in fatherly comfort.

“Hello again Joel. You just getting home?”

Joel nodded from his place on top of his horse, a near reflection of the night before. “Yeah. We had a long day today, didn’t we girl?”

You smiled as you watched him lovingly pat the side of his brown quarter horse.

“You know, I’m cooking some of my famous soup tonight. It’s been stewing all day and I sure could use some help eating it.”

You couldn’t help but smile at his dim suggestion that was a clear ploy. “Hmm, I wonder who could be available to help you out there Joel. I think I may know someone.”

Joel raised his eyebrow with fake astonishment, “Oh really? Maybe this someone could hitch a ride with me on the back of my horse and I could give them a homecooked meal tonight. I’m sure this someone hasn’t had one in a longgg time.”

You shook your head grinning ear to ear, “You’re ridiculous you know that.” However, the humor was quick to leave your eyes as you thought about Joel’s home. Most, if not all of the memories were drunk with her. “Will uh-will Ellie be there?”

Joel’s smile fell the slightest bit as he answered honestly. “Nah. She’s out on patrol tonight and she won’t be back ‘til morning. Besides, she’s got her own little place behind the house now. She only really comes around when she wants some of my cookin’ - and who could blame her!”

You reveled in his talent of being able to turn a near-sour moment into a positive one. “Then I guess I have no choice but to have some of your world-famous soup.”

With that, you reached your hand up to meet Joel’s as he assisted you in getting on the back of his horse.

You noticed that it wasn’t as cold today. The snow was beginning to melt from the bare branches of the trees and it nearly felt like a new season was on the horizon. You knew it was silly, but you thought how nice it would be should your life be shifting in a sort of new beginning as well. One with a happy, healthy mother and maybe one without as much hatred for a girl you were desperately trying to forget.

Before long, you and Joel were at the all too familiar Rancher Street with his modest home in the near distance. The white picket fence stood out amongst the soggy brown soil as you walked from the back of the house, where Joel had stowed away his precious mare, to the front entrance. The dingy garage where you knew Ellie was living sent a shiver down your spine as you spotted it sitting beneath the dim oil street light. Quickly, you turned around and followed behind Joel before curiosity got the best of you.

The moment Joel flicked the light switch, the orange, warm hue was so familiar and comforting that you felt like you were drenched in the comfiest blanket you’d ever felt. His home felt so warm. However, your comfort was interrupted by a rustling coming from deep within the home.

“Stay here,” Joel said with a protective outreached arm as his eyes scanned the parameter.

Cautiously, he walked in a near slink-like manner as he retracted the knife that he had stowed away in his back pocket and held the sharpened end out in front of his chest. Foot by foot, he walked slowly, yet with assertiveness.

Just as Joel got to the very back of the main hallway a rattle sounded again in the same area which you now presumed was the kitchen. Out of caution, he rested the flat of his back against the wall that was shielding the kitchen from the rest of the home until suddenly, a figure that appeared to you as a shadow began coming closer and closer to the open doorway that Joel was centimeters away from.

Joel knew it was now or never as he jumped quickly, keeping his head straight to stare directly into the kitchen at whatever or whoever was intruding in his space.

“You nearly gave me a heart attack kid! What are you doing here?” You saw a full sigh leave Joel’s body as his body physically relaxed right in front of you. You watched, puzzled by the entire situation, until you heard the voice of the mysterious intruder who, it turns out, was no stranger to you afterall.

“Sorry”, she spoke. At the sound, you felt as if every bone in your body broke all at once. You had the urge to run straight out of the door you had walked in moments ago, yet you remained frozen in place.

“Me and that new guy switched shifts and I smelled your soup cooking on my way home so..”

“So what you’re saying is, my soup made you break into my damn house?” Joel spoke with amusement in his voice. From his side profile, you could make out his signature amused smile as he shook his head back and forth.

Ellie said, “Pretty much,” and you could perfectly picture the way her shoulders shrugged in playful arrogance.

“Well don’t let me interrupt your dinner. Help yourself,” Joel said as his am stretched upward on the door frame and looked down the hallway. His face went slack as he remembered your presence as well as the promise he assured you of and how that promise was under the very same roof.

Joels mouth hung open while his eyes looked at you with “i’m sorry” written in his pupils. He tried his best to assess the situation and somehow work it out in your favor in a matter of minutes, but it was inevitable.

“Were you talking to someone outside? I thought I heard you.” Ellie questioned as she screwed the lid on her thermos. Joel didn’t answer - he appeared frozen in time as he searched your face.

“Or have you started talking to yourself now that you’re getting old as shit?”, Ellie teased with a smirk, expecting a similar reaction from Joel, yet his face remained like a stone.

“Is everything okay?”, she said with genuine concern in her eyes. “Oh god, did you bring a date home or something?”

Before Joel could figure out a plan or stop her from moving past him on the opposite side of the kitchen island, Ellie emerged from the doorway and was met with your hardened figure by the front door.

Neither of you said anything. It felt like a staring contest to see who would say something or make a move first and both of you were overly committed to winning this game of sorts.

“Uh.” Joel spoke as he moved to stand directly next to Ellie. “I’m uh-i’m sorry Ellie. I thought you wouldn’t be around or else-”

“Why’s she here?”, Ellie spat with eyes narrowed directly on you.

“I’ll just go.” Your hands shook as you turned yourself around and wrapped your hand around the door knob. You began to twist against the cold metal, until you heard an urgent “Wait” as Ellie protested your departure.

She wore a much softer expression when you turned around. Her face had relaxed-almost fallen-and her eyes were sympathetic.

“I was going to take this to go anyways”, Ellie said shaking the thermos for emphasis. “I’ll uh-catch you later Joel. Thanks for the soup.”

Accordingly, Ellie slipped out of the back door-her winter boots leaving mild, yet visible foot prints in her wake.

As soon as the door closed, Joel offered an apology that sounded as if he had put you in the most horrifying situation possible.

“I told you Joel. It’s fine-really!”

“Are you sure? Wouldn’t want you thinking i set this up somehow. No matter how much I enjoyed you with Ellie, I would never do that to you.”

You nodded honestly. “I know.”

After the apologies and reassurances, you and Joel jumped right in to where you’d left off. Joel immediately went to work in the kitchen. Grabbing bowls and spoons and napkins. Asking you what drink you’d like and offering up his prized whiskey that you knew he didn’t offer to just anybody.

Just as the two of you were sat at the table with all the dinner essentials, there was a light knock at the front door. One that was so faint, if it weren’t for the silence of the apocalyptic world, you surely would’ve missed it.

Joel sighed as he stood from the table and tossed his napkin down onto the white lace table runner. “Sorry for all the interruptions. I’ll be quick.”

You nodded as your lips met the tip of your glass and the copper colored liquid burned down your throat in the best way possible. The whiskey was smooth and had you reminiscing on all of those past dinners with Ellie and Joel and this divine whiskey. If only things were as simple now as they were back then.

Joel’s voice was mumbling something in the distance, but his tone was so deeply hushed, you couldn't make out exact words or phrases. Then, came the footsteps. Suddenly, Joel and Ellie were standing in the dining room, both looking less than ecstatic.

“I’m sorry to do this to you, but Ellie’s generator blew out and can’t seem to get it up and running again.” Joel’s eyes couldn’t even look at yours as he spoke.

“I can just go to Dina’s or something-“

“No.” Joel and Ellie’s heads shot up to look at you which suddenly made you grow shy over your protest that flew out of your mouth before you could even properly think about it. “You should stay.”

“I should?”, Ellie questioned with a crease running along her forehead and eyes that were bunched together.

You look at Joel and then back at Ellie. “Yeah, you should.”

The dinner was quiet. It seemed like you could hear the sound of every fork scraping along China and each gulp that moved liquid down someone’s throat. Joel was the only saving grace, and thank god for it.

“So. What are you up to nowadays? Where have you been staying?”

“A town thats a bit away. Nothing special about it really. I mainly keep to myself and just try to stay alive.”

Joel nodded along as you spoke. “Do you think you’ll ever come back to Jackson permanently? I know you’re missed her and not just by your mama.”

Curiously, your eyes move over to Ellie’s to see if Joel’s question gets any sort of response out of her. She is stone faced as she moves her fork around her plate.

Secretly, in the deepest pit of your stomach You wanted her to miss you. You wanted her talk about you constantly while you were gone. You wanted her to not be able to move on from you just as you weren’t able to move on from her.

How selfish. You knew it was an act of ultimate self pleasure and yet the indulgence never ended. Some sick part of yourself wanted her to ache just as much as you were aching to be with her again. Yet you suppressed it all.

You acted as if she didn’t exist and that you didn’t care, but at this dinner table you could feel your facade crumbling into a thousand pieces because every damn question, you found yourself looking to Ellie to see a reaction of pain or longing or something else to signal that she missed you or cared about what you had been up to since you left. You weren’t even close to being over her, regardless of how hard you tried.

“Everything alright?”

You looked up to see both Joel and Ellie staring at you in the midst of your silence. You could only hope your facial expression didn’t give away how truly crazy and overwhelmed you felt.

“Yeah-yeah! I'm fine, just a bit tired I guess.”

Joel nodded as he spooned the final bite of his soup into his mouth. Ellie’s bowl was still nearly full.

“Maybe I should head out.” You said, patting the napkin along the line of your lips. “It’s getting late and I want to get up bright and early to see my mom.”

You needed to get some fresh air and you needed it now.

“I can walk you.”

For a moment you felt anger. Anger that your loneliness was being dismantled when you craved solidarity, until you remembered who it was that was saying those sweet words. The very poison that filled the cup that you couldn’t seem to drag away from your mouth.

“You don’t have to, really”

“I know I don’t have to.” Ellie’s tone was one you didn’t dare to question. Not that you had a choice as she was already gathering her belongings that were strewn by the back door.

Ellie fully prepared to give you a true piece of her mind. She told herself that if ever given the opportunity, she would lay it on you. Tell you how much you hurt her. Tell you how confused and fucked up she felt after hearing that you’d left without a trace, all while being silent with your goodbyes. She’d rehearsed the speech a million times in her head when she’d lay in her empty bed with nothing but the light of an outdoor lamppost casting shadows through the dustied window. She was so dark and utterly alone.

On the other hand, Ellie was an idiot either. She knew the reason you left was because of the fight. She knew she was being a child, and she knew that she was fighting off a force that wasn’t a threat to her, but Ellie would’ve never expected you to leave how you did strictly from her actions. You were headstrong and stubborn and everything she loves in a woman - but who's to say a human can’t have moments they regret.

Who's to say that Ellie wished she told you right then and there that she loved you instead of acting like you were a puzzle she didn’t know the answer to when she knew, damn well, that she was completely smothered in adoration for you. She knew she loved you - but saying it made her vulnerable, bare-naked.

She’d lost so many in life and getting closer to you-loving you- would just be a precursor for the pain Ellie would feel when she eventually lost you, because everyone leaves. That’s exactly what you did. You left.

Silently, you walked to the front door, grabbing your coat and slipping on your boots over your wool socks.

“You both be safe alright?”, Joel said while walking towards the both of you as you stood by the front door. He wore a smile that was interesting to say the least. You swore you could see hope in his eyes.

“Thanks again for dinner Joel.” You kindly waved him off and turned around to face Ellie who was holding open the front door for you. Chivalry isn’t crucified after all, even when it’s your ex.

It was so quiet. A howl from the wind or a nearby coyote was the only audible objects-that and the snow being smothered underneath both of your shoes. Speaking of shoes - the canvased sneakers that were nearly begging to be tossed in the trash still clung to Ellie’s feet even in this sort of weather. It made you chuckle ever so slightly.

Funny - Ellie wasn’t sure what on earth could be funny at a time like this.

“What?”

You shook your head, feeling shy all of a sudden as Ellie tried her best to figure you out. So many questions hung over her head when it came to the thought of you. A deep marooned contrast of when she was yours and you were hers; she’d never known someone as much as she knew you back then.

“No, tell me. What’s so funny”, Ellie’s words came with venom in her spit. It caught you off guard as you walked with your mouth agape before directing your eyes to the road ahead instead of Ellie’s tattered shoes.

“Those fucking things,” You said motioning to the shoes that Ellie glanced down to look at.

The skin on Ellie’s forehead screwed together as she too kept her eyes forward. “What about them?”

“Nothing.. just..still wearing those converse in the snow I see.”

Suddenly Ellie stopped in her tracks as flames began to seethe through her pupils. She felt her muscles tense up as her jaw began to ache from how hard her teeth were being gnashed together on her own accord. “Why do you do that?”

You were confused, but mimicked her stillness as your hands settled to cross in front of your chest as if it were a boundary. “Do what?”

“Talk down to me like that!”

“Oh c'mon El, you know I’m only giving you shit. Lighten up a little.”

“Lighten up? You want me to lighten up after-.” Ellie stopped the words from tumbling out of her mouth by pinching her lips together as tightly as she possibly could.

There it was. The barricade was bombed and the dam was broken. You could feel your body begin to shake and your teeth grit behind your lips as the topic that you were desperately trying to avoid-the very elephant in the room was being exposed and drawn from behind it’s curtain.

“You really want to do this now? While my fucking mother is in the hospital Ellie! I don’t know if she's even going to make it and you’re focused on why I left?”

Suddenly you were the one steaming red as your gut reaction kicked in. Your palms met Ellie’s chest as you pressed her backwards slightly. Not in an effort to physically harm her, but one that got her-the trauma-as far away from you as possible. “Get away from me.”

Of course Ellie felt bad. Your mother hadn’t even crossed her mind today, she was ashamed to say. It seems that the anger and sadness and grief of you overcame the entire reason she was seeing you face to face, thus her being too free spoken with words that fell on the spectrum of hate.

By the time she’d accepted her ignorance, you’d already started fast walking away.

“Hey, please. C’mon babe.” Ellie knew it was trouble the second the pet name was accidentally spoken.

“Don’t you dare call me that!”

Ellie could feel the tears well in her water line and god did she hate it. She hated how you were pushing her away again and again and again even if she knew why.

“Just talk to me, please.” Ellie begged with a tone that was pathetic to any ears who caught it. You’d be lying if you said it didn’t affect you.

Ellie was never one to show emotion. Exhibit A: when you confronted her about what the both of you were and she responded with “I don’t know”. You’d think the girl was a god damn Capricorn with the amount of avoidance she displayed when it came to anything emotional. But this was so much more than the stars in the sky and the time she was born.

In the heat of the moment, the both of you had already swiftly walked the route to your mothers home. You knew you shouldn’t do it, yet you felt it gnaw away through your skin, into your bones as the anger and frustration began to slither away to hide in the snow covered grass.

“Do you want to-“

“Yeah”, Ellie interrupted with several nods of her auburn colored head.

[parad-ice-lostandfound]

Prompt: The story about a prince and a traveller <3

Pairing: Malleus x Gn!Reader (Yuu)

Genre: Slight angst (?), Fluff I dunno

TW: Uh, although this is GN! Reader, the reader or Prefect or Yuu is referred to as "Mama" at one point in this. It is meant to be a gender neutral form of address (but if there is another form of address that is more fitting in the scenario please let me know), minor character death, heavily based on Orpheus and Eurydice's story.

AN: Not really happy with the ending of this, but its been in my drafts for far too long. It would have been more angsty, but my sister (who I usually make read my fics to check if it sounds coherent and/or is good) as well as my friends who I showed the initial draft to said that it would be too cruel and that I should make it a happy ending so here we are! Hope you enjoy!

One upon a time, there used to live a prince.

The prince was the heir of a prosperous kingdom. His wise eyes looked over his subjects with the love of a friend and the vigilance of a father. All he ever wanted was for his kingdom to flourish and grow, for his people to live happy lives. And he worked hard to ensure their protection, so that they may spread their wings under his watchful gaze and soar to new heights, bringing honor and prestige to their kingdom. In turn, the people of the kingdom loved and respected him, singing his praises to the birds in the sky and the flowers blooming in the soil. There was no one in the kingdom who would speak ill of their prince, for he was beloved by all.

But, the prince was lonely. He had loving friends to lean on, and trusted elders to learn from, but his heart yearned for that one person who would transform his happy yet monotonous days into pure bliss. His one true love.

And how fortunate was he to find it, in the most unexpected of places, at the most unassuming of times.

He found his solace, his refuge in a traveler from far, far away. It was love at first sight, though the prince would come to realize it much, much later.

The traveler was an intriguing, mysterious figure; quickly endearing themself to each person they came to know. Many vied for their hand, for their affections, yet their eyes seemed to sparkle for only one; the prince.

After many trials and tribulations the two were finally able to be at each other's side. The prince took the mysterious traveler as his spouse, his to love and nurture and adore forevermore. Yet such bliss, was fated to be short-lived.

Death came calling soon, far too soon for the traveler. No matter how much effort the prince expended to save his beloved, their life slipped through his fingers like grains of sand.

The prince was stricken with grief. He mourned for the untimely loss of his pride and joy, and his people mourned alongside him. His heartfelt cries and pleas reached the heavens, moving the hearts of the Great Seven themselves.

One day, the prince was visited by the Thorn Fairy in his dreams. "Child, I have heard your prayers. Your devotion to your beloved is commendable, but the other side can often be cruel. It is best if you let those who have left rest where they rightfully belong, for the price to bring them back is often steep. Are you willing to do anything to have your beloved by your side once again?"

"Anything," the prince replied, with a conviction that moved the fae's heart. The fae sighed, and said, "Very well. If your love is true, and your decision final, then I shall not stand in your way. But be warned; one misstep, and your love will be lost forever. Do not look behind, for nothing exists there except regret."

The prince woke up in a dark cave, the Thorn Fairy's last words ringing in his ears. A warning, and a hint.

The prince followed his instincts; standing up and walking towards the small pinprick of light he could see in the distance. The floor of the cave was damp and cold. It seemed as if the shadows were clinging on to his legs, beckoning him to stay, to rest a while, but the prince continued moving ahead.

After what seemed like hours, (for the prince could not say if time was passing or if it was frozen. All he could do was walk and walk and walk-) the prince heard footfalls of another person, walking behind him. A voice called out to him, the tone so timid and fearful than he had ever heard it be, yet unmistakable. It was the voice of his beloved traveler, his most adored spouse.

The prince nearly turned to look at them, wishing to see what state they were in. He barely caught himself from doing it at the very last minute, remembering the fae's warnings.

Do not look behind, for nothing exists there except regret.

The prince kept walking ahead resolutely, one foot placed in front of the other with a haste. His heart beat wildly inside his chest, as if it was trying to escape its bony prison. The footsteps of his beloved echoed louder as they followed him.They called out to him again, hoping, perhaps, to get a reply; to get a confirmation that their love had truly come for them. But the prince did not answer, in fear of being tempted to look behind. Silently, he walked on ahead, his gaze trained on the light that seemed to get bigger and brighter as he walked towards it. Only a little more, and then...!

His beloved's voice grew frantic the longer he did not reply to their calls. The prince, in his hurry to reach the light and reclaim his beloved, had started walking faster, much faster than they could keep up. So they ran behind him, calling out to him. And fell, just as the prince took one step out of the cave.

The pained hiss that left his beloved's lips was the last straw for the prince. He turned, his eyes widening as the figure of his beloved knelt inside the cave, so close yet so far away from the sunlight, from him.

"No, no, no, no!" The prince exclaimed, falling to his knees and letting out an anguished wail as he wrapped his arms around his beloved. His beloved, who was gradually crumbling away into dust. Even so, they had a calm smile on their face, their hands coming up to cup his cheeks.

"I love you," was all they said, before they returned back to eternal rest.

...

Malina pouted, her hands resting on her father's shoulders as she looked up at him with wide teary eyes. Maleah, her twin, sat beside her on their father's lap, frowning as she asked, "Why did the traveler not return to the prince? He was out of the cave, was he not?"

Malleus gave his two children a gentle smile. "He may have been out of the cave, but the traveler was not. He turned back before they could take a step into the sunlight," he explained to her patiently, eyes shining with amusement as he watched her frown get deeper.

Malina sniffled, her big teary eyes sending a stab of concern through him, and Malleus held her closer. "But that's not fair..." she whined, hiding her face in the crook of his neck.

"What's going on?"

"Mama!"

The two little girls scampered off his lap, making their way to their other parent who picked them up with a confused yet fond smile on their face. "Father was telling us the story of the prince and the traveler," Malina said as she wrapped her short arms around their neck.

They narrowed their eyes at Malleus as they held the little princesses in their arms.

"Malleus."

Malleus chuckled, the sound soft and slightly hesitant as he made his way to where the three of them were standing. "Apologies, my beloved," he said in a soothing tone, his hand rising to tuck a wayward strand of hair back in its place, hoping that the loving gesture would take away some of their anger.

"We will be having a talk about this later," they huffed, and Malleus nodded, placing a gentle kiss on their forehead.

He watched as they brought the young girls back to their bed, settling the little ones and promising to tell them a better bedtime story than the one their father had told. Malleus smiled as he sat behind them, his arms wrapping around their waist loosely while he placed his chin on their shoulder. A soft rumble left his chest when they raised their hand to run their fingers through his hair as they regaled the two sleepy girls with tales of knights and princesses.

Soon Malina and Maleah drifted off into sleep, holding each other close. Yuu sighed, a fond smile playing on their lips as they looked at their children.

"Hornton."

Malleus pressed his lips against the nape of their neck and smiled. "Yes, my dear child of man?"

"You are a menace," they chuckled, and Malleus smiled.

"Perhaps."

They hummed, the sound light and sweet as it carried into the otherwise silent room.

"One day, they will learn that it was all a true story," they said.

"I believe they would like our version much better, when the time comes," he mumbled against their shoulder, the great dragon fae being lulled to sleep by his beloved's soft voice.

"Definitely, Hornton. Definitely."

[watermelonsugacry]

Hii! I don't know if i didn't check properly if you had written it, but when is their weddingggggggg, are the 1d members invited or is it an intimate gathering!?!?!?! i need to knowwwww!

Forevermore

A/N: SINCE 2010 ficmas day 5! sorry for the super late post again, im so bad at this lovies 😅 but she's finally here and probably one of my most favorite chapters in YNrry's story!!

SUMMARY: YN and Harry finally (and secretly) tie the knot in her hometown surrounded by their closest friends and family on their anniversary. Here is where they reminisce a couple of Christmases back when they officially became a couple along with some unexpected circumstances. (8.7k)

GENRE: 1dbandmember!yn

SINCE 2010 masterlist // ficmas 2022 masterlist

"YN!" The couple looks up towards the front door to see a very excited Penny on the porch. The two bark out a laugh as they see the woman with her hands in the air, her hips shimmying from side to side before making her way down the porch steps. YN meets her step mum halfway and they join each other in a tight warm embrace. 

After YN and Harry wrapped up their last shows of the year for their world tours, it was time to pack their things and fly over to Doncaster for their small, secret wedding. They’ve done their best acting work yet in keeping their engagement away from the public eye for almost a year and it was finally time to fulfill their promise to become husband and wife on their anniversary.

After some careful planning, the couple ultimately decided to have their wedding at the Tomlinson’s family home right in the backyard with a few selected guests outside of their immediate family members. 

"Hey mum," YN mumbles into the older woman's shoulder.

"Oh, it's so good to see you, my baby," Penny reaches out, gripping Harry's wrist to pull him into the group hug as well. YN’s stepmum has so many wonderful and cheerful qualities about her but the one thing that Harry loves the most about the love of his life's mum is that she never fails to make someone feel so welcomed.

"Ugh, you're here. You both are finally here. And you mister," Penny pulls back to shove a playful finger at Harry's chest. "I haven't seen enough of you in a hot minute."

“Been a bit busy with work and everything but never too busy for you, Pen,” He gives the older woman a charming smile. Penny squeals and pinches at Harry’s cheek.

“Yeh too sweet, can’t get enough of you!” Penny hooks her arm through with her daughter's and walks back towards the grand house, "Harry leave those bags there in the car. I'll have Louis and the boys come out and help you with that so if I see you carry them inside I'll smack yeh. Come on!"

As they walk up the rest of the gravel driveway, Harry can't help but think back and reminisce on the night he took YN to his mum's house for Christmas almost four years ago in 2019.

...

Harry opens YN’s car door as she carefully tries to take off her seatbelt while simultaneously trying to keep a homemade cookies bag from toppling over. 

While YN spent Christmas Eve/Louis’s birthday with the rest of the Tomlinson clan, aka her family, she couldn’t possibly deny Anne invitation to spend Christmas day with the Styles. It was a new experience for her spending this holiday away from her family, but she was more than happy to comply with her best friend’s mom’s wishes. 

After spending two months in Malibu earlier in the year, and after having having a much needed talk with Harry about their feelings for one another, they’re still trying to navigate how to go through with their acts of devotion towards one another. As much as it hurt the both of them to end their relationship once more, they decided to do the healthy thing for once and focus on themselves and their mental health first before pouring out everything they have toward someone else. 

It turns out that their crisp trepidation was too heavy to simply shake off so quickly.

Their friendship, however, could never be tossed aside.

When she closes her door with her hip, she can hear Harry close the backseat door and he holds the Christmas gifts they brought for the Styles family. Anne’s house reminded YN so much about her stepmum’s home: a tiny little cottage-like home with a vast amount of greenery surrounding the area. It instantly brings a smile on her face and makes her feel at home being away from home.

“Hey um,” YN looks up at Harry as they walk up his mother’s driveway. “I just want to say that I really appreciate you being here. I know you spend this time with your family so I just wanted to say that it means a lot that you’re here with me. You really didn’t have to.”

“Well, remember I’m only here for Anne,” YN jokingly reminds her friend.

“M’being serious though.”

“So am I.”

“YN,” Harry stops them as the reach the front door. Due to Harry's hands being full, she takes the liberty to reach out and ring the doorbell. “Look, before we go inside, there's something I need to tell you...”

“I’m all ears.”

“I-”

“YN!” Anne's voice breaks through the space and she’s instantly lighting up from the older woman’s energy. Anne wastes no time pulling her in for a hug while Harry is left hanging in nervousness. “Merry Christmas, hun.”

“Merry Christmas, Anne. It’s been so long,” YN says over her shoulder. She’s missed her so much more than she realized as she almost gets emotional at her embrace.

“Too long. It’s a crime that Harry doesn’t bring you along when he comes home,” The two women look over at Harry but YN notices how he quickly puts a smile on his face. She slightly furrows her eyebrows at his actions but before she can fully question him, Gemma comes out from the hallway and walks towards the three of them.

“Hey you,” Gemma immediately wraps her arms over YN’s shoulders.

“Hey Gem. How’ve you been?” The two of them sway quickly back and forth for a second before pulling away.

“Great now that you’re here. Hopefully my brother hasn’t been giving you much trouble,” Gemma says while nodding her head to Harry. When she looks back at Harry again, she sees his mum helping him with the gifts they brought. He looks up at her again as well and smiles a closed lipped smile, they kind where his dimples don’t dig into his cheeks in the way she likes. 

What’s up with him?

“Never. Oh—” YN quickly remembers the big ziploc bag in her hand. “Me mum made cookies earlier today and she wasn’t gonna let me come over here without bringing you all some.” 

“Aw, you all are too sweet. I love that pretty Penny to death,” Anne gushes as she takes the bag from her extended hand and beckens YN and her son to come further into the house. “Make yourself at home, YN. I’ll introduce you to the rest of the family and later we have some games we’re going to play. So bring your A-game, the Styles are very competitive—not like you don’t already know. Especially these two,” Anne points to her two children.

“Well m’not one for losing either, Annie, so they better have their guards up,” YN smirks and the two women pretend to be baffled before they all break out into chuckles. “And I will, thank you.” 

When Anne and Gemma both walk and disappear further into the home, YN turns to Harry and begins to take off her shoes. “You alright, babe? You look a little pale,” She puts the back of her hand to Harry's forehead just to make sure. Harry shakes his head and softly grasps her hand in his.

“Yes...well maybe? I dunno, really,” He lets out a nervous chuckle and it only makes her more concerned. “I just need to let you know that—”

“Uncle Harry!” A little boy YN recognizes to be one of Harry’s few nephews comes running up to the two of them and Harry is quick to put a bright smile back on.

“Hey, look at you! You’re so big now,” Harry wraps his arms around the back of the boy’s legs and lifts him up. “You’re a full-fledged adult now, aren’t yeh? Look at that mustache on your lip. See that, babe?”

“Oh yeah,” YN plays along with Harry’s teasing. “Might need a trim soon, for sure.”

The young boy laughs when Harry wiggles his fingers under the little boy’s armpits before setting him down. Soon after, the little boy is dragging his uncle further into the house and into the living room announcing how he needs to show him all of the new toys Santa brought him last night. When Harry gives her a shrug of his shoulder with yet another tight-lipped smile as he gets whisked away, she’s left wondering what he needs to tell her so badly.

...

When Harry trails behind his fiancée and her mum inside the Tomlinson house, the sound of chatting and commotion fills the spacious living room instantly. 

“Aunt YN!” A little carbon copy of Louis comes running to up YN and he tightly wraps his arms around her torso.

“Freddie! Aw you’re too big now, lad. Almost didn’t recognize yeh. How are you, little man?”

Harry happily looks on at how the Tomlinsons come up to hug and greet YN before they get to him. YN can’t help but coo when Lottie carries in her new baby, she does her secret handshakes with each of set of twins and warmly greets the older Tomlinson grandparents. As Harry finishes greeting Lottie’s boyfriend, he fondly looks at how her and Louis give each other a kiss on the cheek before staying in their embrace for a minute longer than she did for the others.

“Why didn’t no one tell me one of my favorite girls is finally here?” Anne quickly wraps her arms around YN as soon as she pulls away from her childhood best friend's hug. 

“Should I be offended that my mum hugged my fiancée first and not me?” Harry hurtfully yet playfully asks his old band mate.

“Deeply,” Louis jokes before pulling him in for a hug, patting him heavily on the back. “S’good to see you, man. Ready for the big day?”

“He’s been ready since he was practically sixteen,” Gemma interrupts with a sassy smile. “He’s gonna have to blow the dust off the paper he wrote his vows on from how long ago her wrote them—hey!” His sister laughs when he gives a playful (yet very real) shove to her head.

...

The night has been a blast so far. The Styles family were much like Penny and the Tomlinson’s in how family is at the core of their lives. After getting introduced to the few family members she didn’t know, they quickly accept her like they’ve known her all their lives.

Harry can see just how naturally good she is at everything. She wins over the grumpy grandparents who only seem to smile once a year and now has them doubled over in laughter. She’s a fierce competitor at all of their family games and doesn’t hold back from her brutal skills as she goes head to head with him over a play of some guessing game. When it’s time to set the table, she’s quickly removing herself from her close spot next to Harry to help Anne with anything she needs.

“Well, she certainly seems like a lovely girl,” Gemma says lowly once she’s slid on over next to her brother. “Very companion worthy.” When she sees him start to pinch worriedly at his bottom lip, she gives him a sympathetic smile, “Still haven’t told her yet, huh?”

“No, and neither will you.”

“You’re gonna have to tell her, H. You have to tell one of them or else it’s just gonna blow up in your face,” His older sister reasons. She’s right, and he knows that she’s right.

“I will,” Harry lowers his voice when he sees YN and his mum come out of the kitchen with plates of food in their hands as they go about setting up the dining room table behind him.

It startles him when he feels two hands on his shoulders and he feels a smile creep onto his face when he feels the side of YN’s face press up against his, “Dinner is officially served. Come on, your mum wants you to sit next to her, and I want to sit next to you.”

With a squeeze of his shoulders, Harry feels giddiness zip through him at her comment and ignores the knowing look his older sister gives him as he gets up from the couch.

...

As everyone gets settled in—mums hustling in the kitchen, little ones running every which way, and the older children talking among themselves in the living room—Louis and YN take a moment to sit outside together away from all the chaos. The backyard was essentially all set for tomorrow. As the two sit on one of the couches of the spacious backyard, in front of them sits two sections of seats, a walkway in the middle and an altar made of branches awaits at the end. The arch of the altar is filled with white flowers. 

The couple was thankful that the England weather was relatively warm this year as there was barely any snow in sight. 

As the two stare out at the set up, YN lets out a sigh, wrapping her arms around her legs and fidgets with the butterfly ring on her finger, “This is kind of surreal, yeh know? Like, after all this time we’re finally gonna do this,” YN huff out a giggle. “Remember when Harry gave this ring a couple of Christmases ago? Feels like ages away."

Louis offers his cigarette to her and she shakes her head to decline.

“That’s around the time he told me he had a crush on you.”

YN snaps her head towards her childhood best friend, “Whot! He told all those years ago?”

“S’not like it was a secret. He practically kissed the ground you walked on. It was pretty fookin’ obvious, love. You know...eh never mind.” Louis shakes his head with a smile and brings the white stick back to his lips, taking a long drag. 

“Oi! Y’can’t say that and then not say what you were going to say,” YN pushes at his shoulder. 

“I dunno why I even brought it up. Don’t know if I should even tell yeh,” YN raises her hand as a threat to hit his shoulder and he slightly cowards back with his hands raised. “Oi, alright, alright. It’s not even a big deal.”

“Y’making it seem that way though. Y’got me all nervous.”

“Well,” Louis tilts his head back as he blows the smoke out from his lungs. He scratches his eyebrow with his thumb with a sigh, “He’d kill me if he knew I was telling yeh this but...y’mum wasn’t the only one he asked for a blessing to marry you.” 

She furrows her eyebrows and tilts her head as she looks to her childhood best friend, her brother. 

“Are...are you sayin’ that Harry asked you as well?” 

Louis just gives her a small smile and silently nods down to himself, bringing his cigarette to his lips once more. 

In the next second, her eyes begin to water at Harry’s gesture. The fact that he went the extra mile to ask her childhood best friend—the man who she sees as an older brother—if he had approval to become her husband makes the love she has for her fiancé grow more and more. She turns her head to look behind her and through the sliding doors that see into the kitchen. 

Penny has Harry’s hands working on needing out a tough ball of cookie dough. He listens intently to her instructions as she pours various cookie toppings into different bowls. His own mum rummages around the kitchen as well, helping learn how to make her soon-to-be mother-in-law’s infamous chocolate chip cookies. 

It seems as though Harry must not be kneading the dough fast enough as her mum comes up behind him and aids his hands into the mix. YN can’t hear it from being outside but Harry’s face says it all as he begins to laugh at the playful action. His eyes crinkle and his dimples pop out as he lifts his shoulders in a fit of giggles. 

YN huff out a small laugh through her nose at the sight and she can’t stop the rogue tears that escape as she falls more in love with the man inside.

“M’happy for you, love,” When she turns her gaze back to Louis, he nods toward the house. “Harry he...he really loves you, YN. He’s gonna be a good husband. And if he isn’t, I’ll kick his arse.” 

YN can’t help but let out a watery laugh, wiping under her eyes before snuggling under his extended arm, “I believe you.” 

They both enjoy the quietness of the outdoors a little longer until they turn their heads to the sound of one of the doors sliding open.

“Auntie YN,” Freddie excitingly steps onto the porch, his cheeks turning pink by the second.

“Freddie, where’s yeh coat?” Louis scolds. 

“Sorry daddy but Grandma Penny said it's time for you to come inside or, or else you’re going to get sick,” The little boy with his father's eyes quickly explains before scurrying off inside.

“You coming inside, Lou?” YN asks, still stuck to his side. He gives her shoulder a squeeze and throws the bud of his cigarette into the grass. 

“Let’s go. Yeh know, you’re gonna be having to scold yeh own kids pretty soon.”

“One step at a time, Lou.”

...

It was safe to say that it’s been a good while since YN has had a home-cooked meal and Anne never fails to provide such delicious food—especially now as everyone feasts on their full plates. Harry’s mum sits at the head of the table, her two children sit in the next seats beside her and YN is seated happily next to Harry. As they all eat and chat away, YN puts a hand over her mouth to prevent food flying out from laughter at one of his uncle’s stories.

Throughout the dinner, her and Harry have been acting like they usually would any other time they’re together. Like when they were all sitting on the couch listening to funny (and embarrassing) stories about each family member, YN sat contently under the comfort of Harry’s arm draped over her shoulder. Or after a round of another guessing game, Harry takes her in his arms and gives her a spin after their team’s victory; boasting loudly and planting a friendly kiss on her cheek. 

Or like now as YN’s giggly body subconsciously leans over to Harry, he doesn’t think twice about putting a hand on her knee, leaning further into her as he lets out a laugh of how own. 

“And when I looked down, it was in my hand the entire time!” His uncle explains the ending to his amusing story and the table goes into another fit of laughter and chuckles. His aunt brings a clothed napkin to wipe under her eyes and playful smacks her husband’s shoulder. 

When YN looks to her best friend, they both shake their heads as giggles and chuckles push past their lips. She gives him the smile that always makes his knees weak and he’s never been more thankful to be sitting down at the sight. 

Anne looks over fondly to her son and YN next to her and can’t help but wave a hand excitedinly in front of her, “YN, dear. I’m so happy you came over for today. But you’ll have to excuse Uncle David over there, he’s a bit of a jokester.”

“Not at all,” YN dimisses with a reassuring wave of her hand. “My uncle Teddy is the same way. It’s nice to see that humorous uncles run in good families.”

It’s nearly impossible to not be in awe of the woman sitting next to him. She’s just so naturally good at everything, and much like her stepmum, she can always make a person feel welcomed, special even, with just one look.

“I’m just so happy that my son has finally brought his girlfriend over for Christmas,” Anne beams from her seat at the head of the table and YN’s fork squeaks against the china plate. Harry nearly chokes on the glass of wine in his hand and Gemma looks up at her the two across from her with wide eyes. The wind gets knocked out of YN as she failed to notice that he was seeing someone on the side, that she failed to notice the possible woman in the room...but another realization presses down on her chest. 

She can feel her best friend tense up next to her and it all makes sense now: Harry didn’t tell his mum that they weren’t together anymore. Harry’s mum was referring to YN.

YN thinks quickly and instead of politely correcting his mum or throwing out all of the questions racing in her mind, she smiles softly at Anne and says, “Thank you for having me.” When she turns her gaze to Harry, he sees him give her an appreciative smile, “M’really grateful to be here with all of you. I’m a very lucky person today.”

“I’m the lucky one,” Harry comments truthfully. He’s so grateful to not only have his best friend over for such a memorable day but for her not exposing him to his entire family on Christmas day. He removes the hand on her knee to bring her hand to mouth to place a kiss on her knuckles and the table looks onto them fondly.

Before Anne can get all teary-eyed over the sight, she puts on a loving smile and announces for everyone to continue to eat up before the food gets cold. As everyone dives back into their own conversations and the room is filled with chatter and silverware claking again, Harry leans over to whisper in YN’s ear.

“Thank you.” YN gives her friend a warm smile like he’s telling her something loving, partly because she feels for him and partly because his mum hasn’t taken her eyes off of them yet, “I can explain.”

“Later,” YN whisper back, interlocking her hand with his. “In the meantime, is yeh nose alright? Looks like wine sky-rocketed out from there from the news," She giggles behind her own glass and Harry falls more in love with her with every passing second.

...

As the night before their wedding day comes to fruition, everyone in the house was sent promptly to bed to be ready for tomorrow—especially the bride-to-be. Penny, Anne, Gemma, and Lottie all shooed Harry away from his fiancé and made sure YN was tucked into bed as soon as possible as she needs her beauty sleep before the most important day of her life. 

While Harry was shoved into a room of his own, he couldn’t stop tossing and turning. As excited as he is for the next day to arrive, he can’t seem to fall asleep without his love snuggled up next to him.

As the rest of the house is already in deep sleep, Harry pads his bare feet out of the guest room and makes his way into the kitchen. He knuckles at his eyes and reaches for the handle of the refrigerator. 

“Not gettin’ cold feet are yeh?” 

Harry nearly jumps out of his skin, quickly turning around to spot his fiancée sitting on top of the dining table. She holds back a laugh around the cookie in her mouth and he notices that she has a steaming mug sitting on the table by her hips. 

“Of course not. Been waiting forever for this day, think m’just too excited to sleep,” He makes his way over to her to stand inbetween her swinging legs. “What are you doing up?”

“Same here. Too jittery to wait until tomorrow,” YN keeps her gaze on the mug next to her as she dunks her stepmum’s homemade cookie in the hot chocolate as she bashfully says her next words. “Plus, I couldn’t really fall asleep without you with me so...”

It’s hard for the two of them not to be reminiscent of always meeting up back in the kitchen: from their two month trip in Jamaica, while making his second album in Malibu, when they officially became a couple in 2019—it all seems a little full circle.

"Will you be a good bride-to-be to your soon-to-be husband and let me have a bite?" He nods toward the chunky cookie in her hand with a grin, ultimately deciding that he can't tease her for her sleep comment because it's the same reasons he's up. He leans forwards when she offers him some but scoffs when she swerves it out of the way at the last second and into her mouth.

When she finishes her chewing, he hushes her laugh by pressing his lips to hers. He pulls her in closer by gripping her hips and she happily cards her fingers through his hair. When teases his fingers under the waistband of her sleep shorts, she pulls away with a giggle.

"Harry, baby we can't here," She whispers into the air as he begins to nibble down the side of her neck.

"Why not?" He mumbles onto her skin and the sound of his boyish whinnying makes her smile.

"Because, quite literally, our closest family members are all currently sleeping under this roof. Me mum can walk in on us. Or your mum. Or Louis-"

"They will walk in on us if you don't hush up," Harry points out and it makes his dimples dig into his cheeks when she giggles softly. "Don't you want me, baby?"

"I want you," YN mumbles shyly and it has him quickly bringing his mouth to hers again. She pulls him closer with a tug of his hair and he groans against her, a noise that has her shushing him just the same way he did to her.

They try to keep as quiet as they possibly can but it turns difficult when they can't stop giggling and hushing each other. Especially how she has to dig her face into his shoulder when he tugs their shorts just low enough until her can push inside her or being shushed when he has to stop to move the steaming mug of hot chocolate to the seat. He tells her to be quiet through a chuckle when she goes to lay her back against the hardwood table and she lets out a string of giggles when the table starts to creek from their movements. Her laughs turn into quiet moans and whimpers when he begins to pound into her and he brings his hand over her mouth as they both come undone.

After busting out the disinfecting bottle and vigorously wiping down the table, Harry escorts her back to her room.

“What?” YN questions when he sees Harry give her a lovesick smile, the same kind of smile that begins to tug one on her own lips.

“This is our last night with you being my fiancée.”

She hums out in agreement. It’s at this moment that she realizes that the scary feeling in her tummy for tomorrow isn’t necessarily out of fear, but excitement. All this time she thought she might be second-guessing herself, making herself think that she wasn’t good enough for Harry, that he deserves someone better. But this gooey twist in her stomach is from how giddy she feels, about how much he loves her. He wants her to be his wife, no one else.

She can’t help herself from stepping forward, placing a hand on Harry’s chest to lean up on the balls of her feet to gently press her lips to his.

“Good night, my fiancé,” She mumbles against his lips.

“Fuck, I can’t wait to make you my wife.”

“Until tomorrow, my love.”

He reluctantly pulls himself away from her with a deep sigh, “I’ll be waiting at the altar.”

“I’ll meet yeh there.”

“Good night, lovie.”

“Good night.”

YN giggles at how neither one of them makes an effort to move from their spots.

“You love me?” 

She barks out a laugh but quickly puts a hand over her mouth to muffle the contagious sound. He puts a warm hand over the one over her mouth while the other puts a finger to his lips, a dimpled smile already breaking out.

“I can’t stand you,” She teases in a whisper. “But of course I love you. Agree to marry you, didn’t I?”

“Damn right you did,” He boasts, walking backwards down the hall. “Good night, baby.” 

“Night,” YN bites her bottom lip to tame her smile and leans her head on the door frame. Before she can get her hand on the door, another giggle comes tumbling past her lips when he quickly makes his way over to her again to give her a loving kiss. He brings her left hand to his mouth to plant a kiss to the ring her gave her before forcing himself down the hall to the guest room.

...

Harry had his explanation ready. It was all planned out a rehearsed to a T, but now as he stands before YN’s awaiting eyes in his mum’s kitchen the next day, he loses all the words he knows.

Yesterday was packed with activities and fun and laughter that it was hard not to pull her away from all that and explain himself. He couldn’t be the cause of her loosing her bright smile as they play another guessing game with his family. He couldn’t be the one to interrupt her laughter while they assembled gingerbread houses.

And the one time he actually had the chance to pull her off to the side, his little nephew pointed out that they were under the misletoe. All of his worrying thoughts came to a stop when she looked up at him with a shrug of her shoulders as his family all had their eyes excitingly locked on them. How could he even think to hesitate when she was so willing and pliable in his hands as he cups her face and presses his lips to hers—their first kiss since they’ve split up a couple of months ago. It was a short and sweet kiss for the sake of his family standing before them but how he wished they were the only ones in the room.

And there certainly was no way he was going to wake her after she falls asleep with her head on his shoulder as the older cousins sit around the living room to watch Christmas movies. When everyone begins to file out of the living room wishin him good night, all he can really do is carefully manuver her so she’s between him and the back of the couch and drap a blanket over the two of them. His heart and the warm feeling inside his chest only grows when she blindly reaches out for him, pulling him close and tucking her head in the crook of his neck.

Now in the cold light of day, Harry has to face the music and explain why his mum thinks the two are still together after already being months apart.

“It’s...look I,” Harry takes in a deep breath. It was already hard enough to proper gather his thoughts at the sight of her alone so it was extremely difficult now under the circumstances. “I didn’t mean to lead her onto to anything, I promise. She was so happy when we were actually together and, and when we broke up, telling her wasn’t necessarily the first thing on my mind. I meant to tell her soon enough and it completely didn’t come to mind that she still thought that way when she invited you over for Christmas. I appreciate you playing along and I’m forever in you debt because of that but, I will tell her. I will tell her today and as much as it will hurt her, I can’t imagine how hard all this is hurting you.”

Harry lets out a deep sigh. He had everything planned and it all came to bite him back in the worst way.

"Hurting me?" YN questions and he's taken back when she gently takes a hold of his chin so his gaze meets hers. "You've been doing the complete opposite. Yeah, this is all a little weird given the situation and I might have been caught off guard but...I miss you. I've missed you for...I honestly don't think I ever stopped missing you. I've been meaning to tell you that I'm ready to be with you, officially, but there never seemed like a good time. And I completely understand if you're not ready to be with me yet or don't want to be with me at all-"

YN is silenced by Harry stepping forwards, cupping her cheeks and pressing his lips to hers.

When he pulls back, he's met with her beautiful eyes that are glazed over in confusion.

"Don't want to be with you at all?" Harry asks in disbelief. "Of course I want to be with you. There's never a day that goes by without me wanting to be with you, YN. I'm ready, I've been ready. No more bullshit or back-and-forth or confusion. I want you, plain and simple."

"I want you, too," YN beams before pulling him back into her.

The two have gone back and forth between being together and not being together over the past two years but this time it feels different, it feels right.

"Well, good morning to you too."

Anne's voice instantly has them pulling apart and taking a step away from each other, like a couple of teenagers caught in an obscene act. Harry's mum smiles warmly at the couple as she goes towards the stove, "Tea, anyone?"

Harry and YN tuck their lips in and one glance at one another has them beaming in embarrassment.

...

"Baby, you have to stop pacing." Penny softly comments from her spot on the dining table as watches her daughter walk back and forth. YN hasn't stopped twisting at the ring on her finger. She's not doing it in contemplation or regretting her decision for this day, it's just a nervous habit she's done ever since she can remember.

"Knock, knock. I’ve got a special delivery from—” Louis peaks his head in from the curtained sliding glass doors and stops in his tracks at the sight of his childhood best friend—his little sister—in front of him.

YN stands before him in her mermaid-style wedding dress. The sleeves are off the shoulder and the length of her dress stops right at the bottom of her feet. Her veils trails behind her and cascades down her back and onto the ground. Her make-up is done naturally and her hair is down and clipped out of her face. 

Tears threaten to escape his eyes but he sniffles them back as best he can, “Wow, YN. Yeh look...amazing.” 

“I don’t really feel amazing,” YN continues her pacing, holding her hands in front of her stomach as she continues to twist her ring and push down on her fingers with her thumbs. “I dunno why I can’t stop my mind from racing. I’m happy, so fookin' happy right now, but I just can’t stay still and, and I feel all nervous and what if I trip and fall while I’m walking down the isle. This all feels so—”

“Hey, hey. Take a breath alright,” Louis quickly steps over to her and places gentle hands on her bare shoulders. He non-verbally instructs her to take in deep breaths with him: in through his nose and out through his mouth. “S’normal for to feel like this, love. You’re happy and you love him and that’s all that matters. But if you don’t want to go through with this either, I’ll start the car up and we can go down and grab a burger, alright? No one can say anything about it.”

After a couple of breathes, YN opens her eyes and flicker them back and forth between his.

“I, I want to see him. Like, if he can just tell me that it’s all alright, that this is all fine or to just hug him or something...”

“Well, I may not be able to give yeh that, but he did tell me to give you this,” Louis grabs a piece of paper from his inner suit jacket, YN carefully unfolds the paper and nearly cries at the sight of her fiancé’s hand writing.

Everything will be alright, my love. I can practically hear you pacing from the outside the house and please stop twisting at your ring or craking your fingers. Your hands will be in mine soon enough. I’ll be waiting at the altar. I love you so much it hurts. Harry x. 

YN huffs out a laugh through her nose at how well he knows her. Harry wasn’t even told what she was doing, surely in hopes to not make him nervous but he knows her like the back of his hand. YN doesn’t even realize how her breathing as calmed down or how less jittery she feels from her anxiety earlier. She doesn’t even realize how big of a smile she has on her face until Louis takes her chin in between his fingers.

“She’s acting like he hung up the moon and stars by the way she’s smiling like that,” Louis jests and YN doesn’t even try her hand at a witty comeback.

“Thank you, Louis. I don’t think I’ve ever thanked you for everything you’ve done for me,” She says sincerely. “From when I was a little girl till now, you’ve taken care of me and looked out for me like a big brother should. You mean the world to me and I love you very much.”

With a tight lipped smile, he pulls YN into his arms before she can see his eyes begin to tear up. 

“There’s no need to thank meh. I’d gladly do it all over again if I had to.”

The three of them turn their attention to a knock on the sliding glass doors before Gemma steps in with an excited smile, "It’s time.”

...

YN can hear the infamous wedding music begin to play outside and she takes in a shaky breath. Penny puts a loving hand overher daughter's that are tightly gripping onto her bouquet and it instantly calms YN’s nerves. 

“Ready, my baby?” She gives her daughter the warmest smile, the smile that’s engraved into YN’s memory ever since she was a little girl. Penny was the only woman her no-good of a father brought home that actually acknowledged baby YN. Penny gave up her free, hippie lifestyle for one of a mother’s and it was a decision, a promise, she continues to fulfill every passing day since. She has been the parent, the provider, and the support that YN needed and YN is forever grateful for the woman standing beside her.

Penny has been more than two parents combined and so after giving her mum a nod, the glass doors slide open and the two woman begin their walk down the isle.

As YN takes her steps down to the altar, she spots the familiar faces around the small number of seats.

She passes by Mitch and Sarah as she’s slightly bouncing their baby boy in her arms.

She passes by the Tomlinson girls—the family she grew up with and calls her own.

She passes some of Harry’s close family members and holds back a giggle when Uncle David gives her two thumbs up.

She passes by the empty seats that were reserved for her two other bandmates who “couldn't make the trip” (an obvious outcome that the couple forshadowed yet still sent out the invitations nonetheless) but she smiles warmly when she sees her favorite blond lad. Niall smiles brightly at her before looking down at his shoes in hopes for her not to see the way he starts to tear up. 

She passes Anne and Gemma in the front row, both with loving looks lighting up their faces. Harry’s mum mouths that she looks so beautiful and puts a shaky hand over her heart. 

She passes Louis as he watches her with his lips tucked to the side to help stop himself from blubbering like a baby. He has been so calm, cool and collected during all of this but actually seeing his baby sister walk down the isle in her white dress is hitting him like a ton of bricks.

And lastly, she sees Harry standing before her at the end of the altar dressed in a simple yet classic tux, red-nosed and teary-eyed at the sight of his bride. When he meets her gaze, he quickly knuckles away the tears before giving her her favorite dimpled smile. He takes in a deep breath, unable to hold back the sob that racks through his chest.

With glossy eyes, Penny plants a gentle kiss to her daughter’s cheek before reaching out to place YN’s hand in Harry’s. He gives the older woman a kiss on her cheek, as well as a reassuring nod of his head as a nonverbal way of saying that he has her. After stepping up to face one another, Penny takes her place on the other side of the front row and as the ceremony begins, she seats herself next to the empty chair reserved for Jay.

...

“YN,” The officiant turns his attention over to the bride. “You may now read your vows.”

After Gemma hands YN the small piece of paper, she looks up to see her groom give her an encouraging smile.

“Harry," YN takes a shaky breath in and her vision already gets blurry. "Shit. Oh! Fook, I'm sorry. Shit! Ahh wait!" She puts a hand over her mouth as the audience laughs at her antics. Harry’s shoulders shake up by his ears and the outer corners of his eyes crinkle as he laughs.

"I love you," he leans over to plant a kiss on her cheek.

He lets out another laugh when she gives him an uneasy look of disbelief.

"Harry,” She starts again. “I don’t think there are words good enough to describe how much how I love you. You’ve shown me so many things, taught me so much about not only in life, but of myself. Before you, I wasn’t a very touchy-feely person. Now, I cannot go a day without one of your hugs. Before you, I couldn’t stand to listen to stupid love songs. Now, I’m constantly writing them about you. Before you, my world was seen in sepia. Now I see colors I never knew existed. You’re truly me best friend, the love of me life, and my soulmate. You understand me more than anyone else, more than myself sometimes. I can’t believe the day has come when we finish with the constantly changing labels of our relationship and finally settle it with husband and wife. I’ll never get tired of saying how much I love you and I can’t wait to start my forever with you.”

As soon as she finishes reading off of her tiny piece of paper, Harry steps forwards, cups her cheeks and plants a kiss to her lips. A couple of the men in the audience wolf and whistle loudly while the women playfully jab at them to quiet down. YN can’t help but giggle against her love’s lips, gripping onto the hands on her cheek before having to pull away.

“Harry, you may read your vows now.”

After calming his boyish smile, he takes his own piece of paper out of the inner pocket of his blazer and with a deep breath in, he begins to read his scribbled words.

“YN, it feels like I’ve been waiting my entire life to marry you. I knew I wanted you in my life when I first saw you at a Battle of the Bands competition when we were merely fifteen years old but I knew I wanted us to be more when we were put in a band a year later. We’ve gone through so many ups and downs over the past 12 years, and while it may have been frustrating at times, you were and always will be worth the wait. You’re my best friend and I truly cannot express how excited and happy I am to start this new chapter in our lives together as not just bandmates, secret lovers, blurry lines or merely as my best friend, but as husband and wife. I have loved you since 2010, now and forevermore.”

...

“Do you, YN YLN, take Harry Styles to be your lawfully wedded husband, to live together in matrimony, to love him, comfort him, honor and keep him, in sickness and in health, in sorrow and in joy, to have and to hold, from this day forward, as long as you both shall live?”

“I do,” YN beams as she slides the wedding band onto Harry’s finger.

“Do you, Harry Styles, take YN YLN to be your lawfully wedded wife, to live together in matrimony, to love her, comfort her, honor and keep her, in sickness and in health, in sorrow and in joy, to have and to hold, from this day forward, as long as you both shall live?”

“I do,” Harry breathes out a smile, sliding the wedding band onto his love’s finger to finish off the last piece of their ceremony.

“By the power vested in me, I now pronounce you husband and wife. Harry, you may now kiss your bride.”

Harry doesn’t waste another second before he cups her jaw and smushes his lips to hers. He wraps his other arm around her back and YN grips onto the front flaps of his tux, pulling him in incredibly close. He leans her back and he can feel her smile against his lips.

“Ladies and gentlemen, I now present to you for the first time, Mr. and Mrs. Styles!”

...

“I dunno, H,” YN says, fidgeting with the rings on her fingers. Now that the two can confidently state that they’re officially together now, she’s scared that their relationship will be seen in the public eye. She knows that when they first started their on-and-off relationship two years ago, they kept it very low-key around their friends, in the studio and only later started to show PDA, but only to their close friends. They’ve managed to dodge past the questions and comments about them being an item for years but this was different. They’re officially a couple now.

The idea of going to a new year’s eve party and the fear of someone taking a picture of them while really doing anything can start a massive misunderstanding in their fandoms. The fans just knew.

“Jonny says that the people he invited were cool, only a handful of close friends,” It’s nice to know that Harry was also on board with keeping their relationship in the shadows. They’re very private people and keeping their personal lives out of the lights is something that they would like to keep. Harry grabs her fidgeting hands and holds them to his chest. “I think we deserve to enjoy more of our holiday before it’s over, don’t y’think?”

His words begin to process in her head as he clutches their hands together. His head bends down to kiss her knuckles, his thumb rubbing over the butterfly ring he gave her a couple of Christmases ago, and it almost made her knees give out. His head bobs a little as he moves to kiss each one. He lifts his eyes slightly to meet hers and she sighs deeply knowing he won.

“As long as I can kiss you whenever I want during the party then maybe it won’t be so bad,” She says, trying to fight the smile that creeps on her face. She’s still very paranoid about the party, but seeing Harry’s face light up at the sound of her agreeing was all it took for her to relax. 

Harry cups her face in his large hands and pressed his lips to hers. She instantly reacts by putting her hands on his waist and turning her head to the side to deepen the kiss. 

This feels right, it feels safe. Now that she’s told him what’s on her mind about their relationship, it’s as if everything seems too good to be true. She feels as if their new relationship is now stronger than whatever they had in the past with them both clear about their intentions, mentally in a better place, and their love for one another already well established.

Harry gently pushes her back until her back is touching the counter. As she feels his tongue slip past her lips, she grips the material of his hoodie around his waist in a silent plea for more.

“Let the girl breathe, will yeh,” Gemma's voice breaks their kiss. 

YN feels the blood rush up to her face and she covers her face in Harry's chest. She feels his arms wrap around her shoulders and his chest vibrates as he laughs. YN hopes it's directed toward his sister rather than her red face.

“Oi, you’re just pissed that your boyfriend doesn’t show you the same affection anymore,” Harry says to his older sister.

“Bogger off,” Gemma says with a laugh. “When you’re finished with your little snog fest can you please send her over to the living room. I’m currently losing charades to a seven year old and she’s my lucky charm.” 

“I’ll be there,” YN’s voice comes out muffled from being pressed against Harry's chest. Gemma gives Harry a nod and once he gives her one back in reassurance, she spins on her heel and exits the kitchen. "Why does this always happen?" YN asks with a shake of her head, confused about how they continue to get interrupted by their family members and it only makes a laugh tumble past Harry's lips.

...

The married couple sits side-by-side at the end of the long table set up in the backyard. Their mums sit on either side of their children while the rest of the family and friends sit down the line. Fairy lights blanket over the yard and it provides the most beautiful light over the small party celebration.

As the table is filled with the sound of chatter as everyone finishes up the pre-made home cooked meal, Harry has his arm draped over the back of YN’s chair where he’ll constantly lean over to her to whisper something in her ear or where she’ll ask to see his left hand again and hold it against hers to see their matching rings.

Louis gives Gemma a nod across from his spot on the table before standing up from his seat, clearing his throat as he taps a knife against his glass of champagne. The chatter begins to die down and soon enough everyone joins in on tapping their glass.

"This should be interesting," Harry whispers to his bride's ear and smiles when she lets out a giggle.

"Ello everyone. For the people who don't know, m'Louis—" Everyone chuckles since the only people invited were family members and close friends. Penny gives a smack to his arm before he continues. "As the best man, I'd like to give a little toast dedicated to the bride and groom. I've known Harry for over a decade and YN since she was practically in diapers. YN, you're like me little sister than anything. As annoying and frustrating as you can be sometimes—" The table laughs and YN has to resist from flipping off her childhood best friend. "—I love you so very much. Harry, I've witnessed more than anyone here how stupidly in love you are with YN. The amount of times I’ve watched these two idiots deny and hide their love from one another during our time in One Direction was truly excruciating to watch. Niall here can back me up on that. It’s that true, Nialler?” Louis lifts his glass towards their blonde friend who quickly nods his head and making the rest of the guests laugh.

“It was painful,” Niall agrees, leaning over to look at the marriage couple. “It even hurt me sometimes, you know?”

YN playfully rolls her eyes with a smile sitting on her lips while her husband pinches at his lips to keep his embarrassed smile at bay.

“But in all seriousness, seeing first hand how these two and fought and clawed their way through all the shit—” Penny smacks his arm once again at his vulgar language. “Sorry, sorry. Through all the obstacles that have thrown their way, their love prevailed through it all. Harry, I know you'll take good care of my sister...even if she stubbornly claims she doesn't need taking care of.”

The couple’s friends and family all make noises in agreement which makes YN playfully scoff at how fast and willing they all agreed. 

“I wish you lot the best and a very happy life together. To the bride and groom."

As everyone lifts their glass in the air, YN can’t help but give Louis a weary smile before blowing him a kiss and mouths that she loves him too.

"Alright, as the maid of honor, I also want to give a toast," Gemma is next to stand. "YN, I've always seen you as a sister and I'm so happy that it's officially offical. I feel that I shouldn’t really welcome you into the family because you’ve always been apart of the Styles family for as long as we’ve known you. Harry, my baby brother," Gemma tilts her head to the side, putting a hand over chest with her lips tucked inwards in hopes to tame her tears. "I'm so proud of all you've accomplished but I'm most happy that you've found your soulmate. You guys were truly made for one another and I could not imagine a more perfect couple."

Harry leans his head towards YN’s and the rest their temples against one another, closing their eyes for a second to live in the incredible bliss they both feel.

With a quick wipe to her watery cheeks, Gemma smiles and lifts up her glass, "You guys are going to continue to have a wonderful life together and yes, I’m calling dibs to be your baby’s godmother whenever the time comes.”

“Oi! Yeh can’t do that,” Louis defends. “That’s for them to pick. And it was gonna be me anyways.”

“I think it’s only fair we get to be the godparents since they’re the godparents of our little one,” Sarah pipes up from the side of the table.

“And what am I?” Niall raises his hands. “A roach?”

As the table begin to get rowdy, Harry waves his hands up while YN just holds her stomach as it begins to hurt from laughing so hard.

“Hey, woah!” He sliences the group. “We just got married, people. We’re not even pregnant. We’re not pregnant, right?” Harry asks his love and it only makes her laugh harder.

“No, no we’re not,” YN pressed the sides of her index fingers under her eyes from the giggly tears that managed to escape. “Oh my word, that was awesome. Gemma, please continue on with your toast before I bust at the seam.”

“As I was saying, we are all so happy for the two of you. You two will have a very happy together. To YN and Harry."

"To YN and Harry!"

"And without further ado, I'd like to invite you two to the dance floor to present your first dance as husband and wife."

And with that, Harry takes his wife’s hand in his as he leads her to the small designated dance area behind their table.

With a click on Gemma’s phone, At Last by Etta James begins to play out of the speakers somewhere behind them and everyone begins to gather around the small area. Their guests pull out their phones to capture the special moment but Harry pays no mind to them as he gently tugs her into him.

YN pulls him incredibly close to her, wrapping her arms tightly around the tops of his shoulders. Harry fully pulls her into him so that there is no space left between them. He digs his face into the crook of her neck and his blunt fingers press into the skin on her shoulders as they gently sway.

All else seems to fade away and it’s just the two of them together as they dance. It all seems so unreal, swaying with Harry—her husband—on their wedding day. Harry’s words the night before were unbelievably true in that he’s been waiting forever to marry this woman. 

Like he needs to make sure he isn’t dreaming, he pulls his face from her neck and sure enough, his breath is knocked out of his chest at the sight of her looking up at him like that, with her bright eyes and golden smile. He can’t help himself from leaning down to capture her lips with his, although a little difficult after a while as they can’t keep their smiles at bay any longer. 

After all the rollercoaster they’ve been on for the past twelve years, it seemed like this day would never come to be. Yet, as Harry mentioned in his vows, she was well worth the wait as he holds YN—his wife—in his arms. 

Thankfully he will never have to let her go as he gets to have her forevermore.

taglist:

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[ghostxrose]

𝑶𝒏𝒆 𝑳𝒊𝒇𝒆 𝑨𝒇𝒕𝒆𝒓 𝑨𝒏𝒐𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓, 𝑭𝒐𝒓𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒎𝒐𝒓𝒆 | 𝑩𝒂𝒌𝒖𝒈𝒐 𝑲𝒂𝒕𝒔𝒖𝒌𝒊 𝒙 𝑹𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒆𝒓

Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Part Five (final)

Note ~ This part is a long one folks.. nearly 5k words.. idk feels long to me so I thought I'd warn ya. Enjoy the read! <3

Tags/Warnings ~ Fem!Reader, Reincarnation, Soulmates, Hurt/Comfort, Angst, Fluff, Emotional, Temporary Character Deaths, Depictions of Injuries, Potentially Triggering Content, No Use of Y/N, Hurts So Good (let me know if I should tag anything else <3)

When you had breathed the first breath of your second life you could already tell that it was vastly different than your first. With the little bit of understanding you had been given at the beginning of that new life, you noticed that your new world was underwater. Your parents seemed to be the same, though; your mother was loving while your father couldn’t care less about you.

As you got older, you learned that the new species you had been born into had called themselves Mermaids or Merfolk. You had a tail instead of legs and appendages called arms, hands, and fingers. You only had hair on your head and all of the teeth in your mouth were sharp.

Your tail and fins were stunning gradients of deep, dark purple into dark blue that shimmered in the sun. Your skin tone was a sun-kissed and glowing golden tan. Black claws grew from the nail beds of your webbed hands. Your long, flowy hair was jet black and your eyes were the same stunning violet with cracks of piercing blue. 

Growing up, your mother and the elders of your pod had told tales of destructive and vicious two-legged beings that lived on land. The stories of your captured and slain kin terrified and angered you. Luckily, in that new life, you had been born much stronger.

Your mother and elders had taught you and the other Mers your age how to become fierce hunters. Not only that but you had been taught how to fight and defend yourself in the face of danger. You had excelled so much that time around that you were regarded with the highest amounts of respect within your pod. A proud candidate of becoming a future leader of the pod someday.

Shortly after entering adulthood, you and a couple of other strong Mers within your pod were tasked with hunting along the reefs near the shoreline. While your mother worried for you, you reassured her that you wouldn’t have been given the task if you weren’t strong or fast enough to handle it. The task itself was easy, the schools of fish that gathered near the reefs made for easy hunting.

Your first few trips to the reefs went by without any problems and were always bountiful. You and the others you went with had yet to run into any of the evil two-legged beings that were rumored to live near the shore. You even got so bold as to perch yourself on a rock that stuck out of the water and sunbathe some days. You only got away with it because your group would split up to hunt and you were fast enough to collect a good bounty before you had to go back to the pod.

During what had felt like your millionth time out at the reef, you were excited to find that when you perched yourself on your usual sunbathing rock, the surface world was gloriously sunny and warm. Laying back on the warm rock, you unconsciously let the happy clicks and whistles leave your mouth.

As you sunbathed to your heart's content, you heard the familiar clicks and squeaks of a pod of dolphins swimming by. Sitting up with an excited smile, you clicked back at them, calling them over to play a bit. You slid back into the water when they drew nearer, having accepted your invite, and began swimming around and jumping with them. Some form of tag had ensued and you were chasing around some of the younger dolphins of the pod.

You were only out of the water for a moment, having been mid-jump, but a moment was all your sensitive ears needed to pick up the sound of voices drawing near the shoreline.

“Aw, man, look! Dolphins!!” An excited male voice had called out, the sound and vibrations of his heavy footsteps picking up their pace.

“Yeah, I see the fucking dolphins! Let’s just hope the bastards didn’t scare the fish away, again! Fishing in this area lately has been shitty!” Another raspier voice yelled out as the pair stepped onto the sandy shore.

You were quick to hide behind your sunbathing rock, only the top of your head and eyes sitting above the water. You fought the urge to hiss as you observed the two-legged beings mess with long weird sticks. But along with the anger, something else bubbled up inside of you, something strangely familiar.

It was a feeling that didn’t feel anything like anger and it left you confused. Two-legged beings were bad. They were monsters. They captured and killed your kind just for your scales. You hated them.. except.. looking at the tall, muscular, and angry-faced ash-blonde on the shore.. you didn’t feel any hate.

You flinched as the two males waved their long sticks around and hissed quietly as two separate somethings landed in the water not far from where you were hiding. You silently slipped completely under the water and swam to where one of the objects had sunk into the sea.

Right away, the flash of something shiny caught your attention along with something else brightly colored. Cautiously swimming closer, you saw that there was a piece of fish meat stabbed onto something curved and sharp. You weren’t sure what the shiny piece or the brightly colored thing was, but the whole thing seemed threatening.

You grabbed the object angrily intending to steal it, but instead, you felt a sharp pain as your hand closed around it. You screeched and tried to pull away but the object was tugged in the opposite direction instead. You momentarily panicked as the object embedded itself deeper into your palm as it was tugged. That’s when you noticed the shine of something very thin attached to the urchin-like weapon.

You quickly bit at the nearly invisible line, hearing the snap of it breaking as your sharp teeth sliced it. Seconds after, you heard yelling so loud that even the water around you barely muffled it. You snickered to yourself for having angered the two-legged being.

You sobered quickly though when the smell of your blood hit your nostrils. Looking back down at your hand, your stomach turned as you inspected the curved barbs embedded in your palm and fingers. Your hand was stuck in a partially crumpled position and blood steadily seeped from the wounds. You prayed to the Sea Goddess that there weren't any sharks around.

Of course, if you had remembered anything from your previous life, it should have been that luck did not favor you. 

It had happened fast, and your first sign had been when all of the reef fish had gone into hiding. Your second sign was the warning calls from the dolphins before they fled the area. You growled to yourself, pissed at the situation you had gotten yourself into.

You were fast but sharks were just a bit faster than Merfolk in general, so swimming away wasn’t an option. You also really didn’t want to get back up on your rock because the two-legged beings were still at the shoreline. But when you saw a flash of gray and white out of the corner of your eye, you knew that you had no other choice.

You darted back over to your rock and clumsily lifted yourself onto it. You had just barely managed to get your tail tucked to your side and away from the edge of the rock when the shark jumped out of the water towards you. You screeched at it loudly, narrowly avoiding its open and deadly mouth.

Letting out another shriek as it partially landed on your body, you swiped at it with your uninjured clawed hand. You slashed one of its eyes and left deep claw marks all over its face as it writhed and thrashed, desperate to get back in the water.

Avoiding its mouth the best you could, you shoved it away from you using both arms and all of your strength. Yet another screech left your mouth as you shoved the shark because the action was driving the object stuck in your hand deeper into your flesh. The shark finally fell back into the water but not without scraping its teeth along the length of your arm and pulling a pained shriek from your lungs.

Water as salty as the sea itself streamed down your face, seemingly from your eyes, and made it difficult to see. Pained noises rose from your throat involuntarily as your chest heaved. Your whole body shook uncontrollably as you watched the shark swim out to deeper waters and eventually disappear, coming to terms with the fact that there was no meal to be had here.

“What.. the.. fuck.. just.. happened?” The angrier male voice from earlier spoke aloud from behind you.

You whipped your head around even though the action caused the world to tilt and spin slightly. You attempted to hiss and growl and warn the two-legged monsters to stay away from you, but your attempts were weak. Your threats turned to whimpers and pained moans very quickly and you looked down at your arm. Blood flowed freely from the sliced flesh, steadily dripping onto the rock below you.

“Ah, uh.. Fuck! Are you okay?!” The previously cheerful redheaded male called out, his voice panicked. You looked back at them, debating whether or not you should answer or just leave and try to swim home.

“You dumbass! She probably doesn’t even understand you!” The angry blonde yelled at the redheaded male. The redhead was about to say something back to the blonde but you interrupted.

“I.. u-under.. s-stand.. W-we.. s-speak.. the.. s-same..” You weakly stuttered out as black spots began to appear in your vision.

“Are you able to come.. To.. shor-” The redhead tried to ask you but it was distant and muffled, and suddenly you were in the ocean again before everything went black...

When your eyes cracked open again, you panicked. Some sort of dim light had revealed that you were no longer in the ocean. Instead, you were surrounded by weird cave walls that weren’t rounded and were made of something weird that didn’t appear to be rock. Not only that, but you were in a very small body of water, the end of your tail had stuck out and was painfully dry.

Panicked clicks and squeals left your mouth as your eyes darted around. Pained yells soon left your mouth as you tried to climb out of the small body of water but your injured arm protested heavily against the action.

Suddenly, the angry blonde from earlier was bursting into the cave-not-cave. You hissed and growled defensively when he tried to approach you. He let out a quiet, irritated growl of his own and put his hands up in a placating manner. Something in you clicked into place when you heard that familiar growl of annoyance come from him and you immediately quieted down. You stared at him with wide and confused eyes while he lightly glared at you.

“You done throwing your damn tantrum?” He asked, his voice full of agitation.

You silently nodded and he rolled his eyes before putting his hands down and stepping closer to you. The pain in your arm and hand hit you again in full force and a loud, pained whimper left your mouth. You went to grab at your arm, now wrapped in weird red-stained material, as more whimpers left your mouth but a large warm hand stopped you.

“Shh, it’s okay. I know it hurts but you can’t touch it, understand?” The blonde said in as gentle a tone as he could muster with his raspy and gruff voice.

You looked into his eyes, his breathtakingly beautiful and familiar crimson eyes, as water flowed from yours once more. He reached his other hand up and carded his fingers through your hair soothingly, his face soft and concerned.

It was like the air was stolen from your lungs when you whispered, “You’re from my first life. You’re him.. My Eternal Love..”

The blonde’s eyes widened for a second before he gave a small smirk, “Yeah. My name is Katsuki Bakugo. Are you planning on being hurt every time we meet, idiot?” He said with a teasing smile on his face.

“It just sort of keeps happening, I’m sorry, Katsuki.” You apologized quietly then gave him your name.

“Do you.. Will you have to go back to the ocean, Violet?” Katsuki asked you, a sad look in his eyes.

“Violet? What is that? My name is not Violet.” You told him, confusedly.

“Agh.. I-I know that! But it’s the color of your damn eyes! And it’s the name of a stupid flower! It’s romantic, damn it! J-just answer my damn question, Violet!” He said exasperatedly as his cheeks turned pink.

A sense of warmth filled you at the name given to you by your Love and a small smile graced your lips. It soon turned to a frown as you thought back to his question.

“I’m not sure.. I don’t think I would be able to live out the rest of my life in this very tiny ocean and I’m sure my pod is worried that I didn’t return to them.. But I do not wish to leave you, Katsuki.” You said in anguish and looked back into his eyes as more water spilled from your own.

“Shh, Violet, shh..” Katsuki said gently as he pulled you to his chest. “How about we get your arm healed and we can figure it out after that?”

You nodded against his chest, your uninjured arm clutching the material he was wearing over his torso. The water continued to flow from your eyes and you let out a low irritated growl.

“What’s wrong now, Violet?” Katsuki asked as he leaned back to look at you.

“My eyes, Kats! What is this ocean water coming from my eyes?! Why won’t it stop?!” You asked exasperatedly.

“How do you speak the same language as me but not know what crying is or  the word ‘tears’?” Katsuki asked amusedly as he wiped the water from your face.

“Crying? Tears? Why are these things happening?” You asked curiously as the ‘tears’ from your eyes began to slow.

“It’s just something that happens when you get sad or hurt, or sometimes if you’re feeling really happy. I suppose you wouldn’t notice tears if you lived in the water.” Katsuki explained to you, then kissed your forehead.

You nodded quietly in understanding while a yawn suddenly left your mouth. A small smile curled the corners of Katsuki’s lips up and he stroked one of your cheeks.

“Get some more rest, my Violet. See that bed right over there? That’s where I sleep and it’s probably where I’ll be when you wake up again, okay?” Katsuki told you gently and you nodded your head again.

He helped you get the end of your tail rehydrated before you sank the top half of your body further into the water. With one last kiss to the top of your head, he made the dim light go out and got into his bed. You fell asleep quickly to the sound of your Love’s breathing and ocean water hugging your body.

The next day, you are woken up by the panicked voice of your Love, “Violet?! Hey! Wake up! C’mon, Violet, wake up!”

You groaned as you groggily opened your eyes, thoroughly confused about what all the commotion was about, “Wha..? What’s wrong, Kats?” You asked as you looked up at his wide eyes and shocked features.

“What’s wro- Violet, look down!” Katsuki said a bit too loudly.

You complied anyway and looked down at your tail.. or.. what had been your tail.. but was now a pair of golden-tan legs.

Shock settled on your face and your mouth gaped wordlessly. Holding out your arms you saw that your fingers, much like your new toes, were no longer webbed or clawed. You felt around your ears and discovered that they were just like Katsuki’s now, no longer bearing finned shells to improve hearing. Your tongue ran along the now flat edges of your teeth and the gills that used to line your ribs were gone.

The only evidence that you were a Mermaid at any point were the small patches of tiny shimmery scales on your arms, legs, and face. At a distance, they could be mistaken for freckles.

You looked up at Katsuki, a tidal wave of emotions crashing through you as you tried to take in what happened to you.

“You didn’t know you could do this?” Katsuki asked gently as he crouched down next to you. You shook your head as your breaths started to get more labored from the panic settling into your bones.

Katsuki was quick to act as he lifted you out of the water and brought you over to his bed. He covered you in something large and soft then seated you in his lap and hugged you close. He spoke soothing words into your hair and rocked you gently from side to side.

Once you had calmed down, you spoke in a shaky voice, “I’ve never heard of this happening. The elders of my pod never mentioned anything like this being possible.”

Katsuki was silent for a moment before speaking quietly, “Violet.. I’m sorry about you possibly losing your family and your home.. but.. what if this was meant to happen by way of the Goddess of Fate? What if this is for us to be together?”

“I.. I can only hope that I’ll be able to visit my home and my family again someday, maybe in my original form, but.. I am very grateful for this, Kats. Of course, I would want the chance for us, you are my Eternal Love.” You said softly and pulled away to look at Katsuki face to face.

Katsuki’s eyes widened a bit before filling with adoration and softening alongside the rest of his features. Neither of you said anything more before you both leaned in toward each other and slotted your lips together.

A few months later, you slowly woke up to the morning sunlight shining into the hut you shared with your Love. Katsuki was already awake, his head rested on your chest and faced towards your stomach as he whispered words and gently stroked the small bump that seemed to grow a little more each day. You smiled warmly as you looked down at your Love, your chest filled with overwhelming emotions.

“Good morning, my Love.” You said as you brought a hand up, your fingers running through his hair and lightly scratching his scalp.

You heard Katsuki whisper ‘I love you’ and then he kissed your stomach before he shifted his body to lean up and kiss your lips.

“Good morning, Violet.” He said with a smile. “You still want to come with me when I go fishing today?” He asked as he laid back onto the pillows and pulled your body even closer to his.

“Yes. I think it’s time I stop fearing that I’ll see a member of my pod and visit the ocean again. I’ve been missing it lately.” You said with mixed feelings.

You were excited at the thought of connecting with the sea again. Excited to walk along the shore, telling your unborn child about everything you see. But you were also nervous and scared of the chance of encountering a mer from your pod. You knew they would be angry at you for not only not coming back home but for choosing to stay on land with the humans.

“You have nothing to worry about, Violet. I’ve been fishing the spot we’ll be going to for a while and there haven’t been any signs of Mers in that area. The fish are always plentiful and my fishing gear stays intact unlike when your crazy ass cut my line.” Katsuki said with a teasing smirk at the end.

“But if I hadn’t messed with you that day and had gone back to my pod like I first wanted to then it would have taken us longer to be together again.” You told him and poked his cheek.

“You were also attacked by a fucking shark, Violet. I think it would have been okay for us to wait a little longer for each other if it meant I didn’t have to see you so damn injured again. But at least I was able to help you with your injuries this time.” He said with an upset look on his face before he hid it and nuzzled it into the crook of your neck.

You tried to apologize but he was quick to kiss you to prevent you from getting the words out. After many more kisses and a bit more time in bed just holding each other, you both got up. When the sun had reached its highest peak in the sky, you and Katsuki went into the village to get fishing bait. Once he had everything he needed, Katsuki led the way to the fishing spot.

It wasn’t a very long walk and your feet were sinking into the warm sand before you knew it. The water was fairly calm at the cove that Katsuki had brought you to, the waves gently lapping at the shoreline. You hesitated for a few moments before stepping only close enough that the water touched your feet when gentle waves rolled in. Your eyes had screwed shut and you anticipated the return of your tail and fins when the lukewarm ocean water first touched your skin.

You were brought out of your scared and racing mind when a large pair of arms wrapped around you and your Love’s voice filled your ears. “Are you okay, Violet?” Katsuki asked in a concerned tone as he rested his chin on your shoulder and his hands gently stroked your stomach.

“Y-yes, I think so.. I just wasn’t sure what would happen when I touched the sea again.” You explained after letting out a relieved sigh at the sight of your still-human legs.

“I told you that you would be fine, Violet. Now, make sure you watch my amazing fishing skills and tell our brat all about how great their papa is!” Katsuki declared with a smirk.

You giggled as he kissed your cheek, then let you go to pick up his fishing pole. He made sure you watched as he cast his line out, a triumphant smile on his face when it went out quite far.

You spent a while talking out loud about everything you saw, your Love’s fishing skills per his request, and shells you found in the sand. You had been in the middle of rubbing your stomach and telling your unborn child about small sea creatures when you were suddenly splashed and hissed at.

Fear washed over you and you stumbled away from the water’s edge. Your panicked eyes searched the water until they caught on a pair of glaring cold blue eyes and blonde hair. Even if that was all you could see you instantly recognized the Mer as your podmate Neito. Your arms wrapped protectively around your stomach and you glared back.

“What are you doing here, Neito? Leave!” You called out angrily. You were splashed and hissed at again, and suddenly Katsuki was standing in front of you protectively.

“Who the fuck is this, Violet? What’s going on?” Katsuki growled out as he glared at Neito who had fully raised his head above the surface.

“How dare you abandon your pod?! Especially for a two-legged! You know what they do to our kind and here you are with one, carrying its child!!” Neito shouted, his voice was full of bitter anger and disgust.

“What the fuck do you know about humans, huh?! What your damn elders have told you is fucking wrong!” Katsuki shouted back angrily, his arms held out to the sides as if to shield you from Neito’s words.

“Oh, I know plenty about you two-legged monsters. Though, I do suppose that you do not seem all that intimidating. I would go as far as to say that you seem like a weak one.” Neito taunted with a smug look on his face.

Before you could stop him, Katsuki had shouted out in anger and raced towards the water. He wasn’t more than shin deep when two other Mermaids appeared from the water and grabbed him. The water became foamy from Katsuki’s thrashing attempts to fight off the holds of the two Mers, but they remained unaffected as they dragged him into and under the water.

As soon as Katsuki was grabbed you screamed, fear and dread filled your body and mind. You ran towards the water after your Love and the Mers that were dragging him away. Neito and the other Mers were fast so by the time you were waist-deep you weren't sure where they had gone.

That’s when you felt your body changing and your vision whited out for a moment. When it cleared again you looked down at your body to see that you had gained your Mermaid features back; tail, fins, and everything else.

You pushed your sudden transformation to the back of your mind in favor of diving under the water and searching for your Love. With your Mer-hearing back, you heard and felt the vibrations from thrashing from feet away and near the surface. You swam as fast as you could towards the commotion, tears flowing from your eyes even though they were immediately lost to the ocean around you.

When you came upon Neito, the other two Mers, and Katsuki they were all surfaced and Katsuki was panting heavily. He was kicking his legs to keep himself afloat but he was no longer fighting the Mers holding him. Judging from his red and swelling cheek and the cut above his eye, you had guessed that the Mers hit him for fighting them.

You swam towards Katsuki but Neito blocked your path causing a growl to come from you and Katsuki. You quickly quieted yourself down when one of the Mers holding Katsuki slammed its tail into his stomach. The pained wheeze and cracking of Katsuki’s ribs caused your chest to hurt and your stomach to drop. You whimpered as you cried and peered around Neito, your eyes connecting with Katsuki’s. He tried to mouth that it was okay but all your brain focused on was the look in his eyes... The same one that he had had in your last life when you were dying.

“Finally, they’re here,” Neito said, his face still smug.

You watched in horror as the heads of  your parents and the rest of your pod surfaced, all of them wearing looks of disgust. You cried harder from the fear of the situation. Your parents swam up to you, your father’s face full of disgust and disappointment while your mother’s was full of shame and sadness.

“You have betrayed us. You have betrayed the pod. You, this monster, and the abomination you’re carrying inside your body must be punished.” Your father said in a bitter and cold tone. This may have only been your second life with your parents but you already resented the way your father made the decision to toss you away so easily.

Suddenly, your parents grabbed your arms and held onto you painfully tight as they dragged you beneath the surface. You heard Katsuki yell and curse until his voice was muffled from the mers holding him dragging him underwater.

You and your Love were positioned to face each other, the two of you being held in place by your captors as you all floated in the open water. Katsuki couldn’t speak it but you could see the fear and love in his eyes. Your heart shattered and you sobbed. The elders of your pod surrounded you both and you knew what they were going to command.

“I love you, Katsuki! I’m so sorry!” You screamed as you thrashed against your parents’ holds. You saw the air bubbles escape his mouth as he tried to say he loved you. Anguish, love, adoration, and heartbreak swirling in his eyes as well as yours.

“Drag him down.” You heard one of the elders of your pod command.

You shrieked, screeched, and wailed as you watched the two Mers quickly drag Katsuki down into the dark depths of the sea. Before you could attempt to break free and chase after your Love the elders gave another command, “Slice up the traitor then leave her and the abomination for the sharks.”

Your shrieks, cries of pain, and blood were all that filled the water as your pod mates took turns swimming past you and dragged their claws through your flesh. You don’t know how long the torture went on for but your voice had given out at some point and your body was almost numb to the feeling of flesh being torn. After your parents each had a turn at leaving their marks your pod left without another word or look back.

As you sank into the dark, cold depths you apologized to Katsuki and your unborn child. It wasn’t long before something fast swam past your limp body. Staring blankly up at the dimming surface, you were happy that your consciousness faded before you could feel the jaws of a great white bite into you.

Author's Note ~ A few months ago when I had first written this fic I *sobbed* as I typed out the end of this lifetime for our poor Katsuki and his Violet, soo.. uhm.. I'm sorry if you cry.. But I appreciate every single one of you Lovelies and thank you so much for everything! <3

Tag List ~ @damnirina @queenpiranhadon

Divider Credit ~ @archonfurina

[honey-minded-hivemind]

How do the angels react when their kids come back (and Morph)?

Morph:

Okay! So, here's what happens:

After the apocalypse, Death appoints the adult mutants to be guardians, Angels/Protectors, to the Horsemen, as both a blessing and curse. They'll never be able to harm them or think of harming them again amd will be reminded of their crime, which akso getting to help care for them and nurse them back to health and protect them forevermore...

Sabretooth, as the Angel of Death, has the ability to bring the kids back to life. He starts with Remy, and is nuzzling him and wiping away the grave dirt... He's gentle, holding him close, wrapping a blanket or cloak around Remy, as they trek back to the temple... from there, Xavier and Hank are able to keep Remy sedated, using medicine made from Lethe to cleanse his blood and wash away the past... and when Remh wakes up, he's being cuddled, fed, and kept close at all times... (his head feels soft, like someone wrapped wool around it... but he feels calm when Victor and Logan and Hank are there, like they're guardians or parents...)

Xavier, as the Angel of War, is helped by Sabretooth and Remy to bring Scott back. Xavier has to calm his mind before sedating Scott, then taking him back to have his wounds closed and tended to... Scott is kept unconscious for awhile so he can heal (and so he doesn't fight back before the medicine takes effect)... but when he wakes up, groggy and tired, he's pulled into Xavier's lap, his hair is stroked, and Logan is there, too, rubbing his back and asking if he needs anything... he doesn't know why, but being near them feels warm... and then another is brought in, and he feels even better... (his sibling! It's Death! He's there, he waited for him!)

Wolverine, as the Angel of Famine, is quick to scoop Reader's body up, and is careful to not jostle them as they go back home... Reader is kept sedated for a very long time, as their body has to be cleansed and mended and fed, and they'd fight them if awake... Logan keeps them company, and Sabretooth stalks in with Remy, promising lots of food and sacrifice when they're better, and how they'll get to sleep in their large nest... Reader, upon waking up on accident one day, leaves... (the Angels and Horsemen are anxious, where are they, where did they go, they need to find them, NOW-!!!)

Magneto, as the Angel of Plague, doesn't leave Pietro alone for a minute. He and Hank amd Xavier work around the clock to cleanse his body of the lingering poison, they make sure his mind is healing, amd take extra care he can't leave them (not like Famine, they must be so hungry, they have to keep Pietro safe for them-)... He missed his son, and reads to him... he speaks of happy endings and daring adventures, hoping his son is feeling better, cared for, at peace...

(Beast is an Angel of Plague and Death, and helped heal the kids and turn the Lethe juice and essence into medicine and salves... he also made sure to discover new medicines and cures and plants, and has a whole library built to contain the knowledge of diseases and cures and flora and fauna...) (Storm is an Angel of Famine amd War, who keeps waters clean and sends rain to help crops grow and sends lightning lightning help burn undergrowth that choke the trees... she is there for the kids, reads to them, and makes sure to find them warm sheets and blankets so they aren't cold...) (Mystique is an Angel of Death and War, who keeps the people at ease, and the children as well... she's careful in what she says, and helps Hank or Erik when needed...)

The adults are so happy to see Morph alive and well, and Morph is quick to fight them- and after the fight, says they're glad to see them again! Wow, a whole decade gone! And they caused the end times!? Well, talk about a self-fulfilling prophecy! They make sure their kinda kids/kinda siblings are alright, they let the others snuggle them and offer free food and sacrifice, and they make sure that the Horsemen can't leave and don't want to leave... even if it means being sneaky and making sure they drink their juice... (Logan is crying when he sees Morph, and hugs the snot out of them) (Ororo also cries, and is pushing food their way) (Hank is giving them a check-up and saying how glad he is they're back) (Victor claps them on the back and says he can't wait to spar with them again) (Raven smiles, and they share some wine later) (Charles and Erik are quick to apologize, and they also make sure they have Lethe given to them)

[seraphiism]

❀ ﾟ. ༄ ┊ 𝐭𝐨 𝐞𝐝𝐞𝐧 ;

( you are a living thing in the family of living things ; the place you belong is here. )

characters : alhaitham • xiao • wanderer • childe • zhongli quote cr : madeleine jubilee saito a/n : for my enemy @micheya for the @favonius-library gift event !! i hope you enjoy this micheya i'll never be mean to you ever again <3

↬ alhaitham ࿐ ࿔

but a scribe does not quite understand the feeling of sanctuary, such sentiments out of sight, out of mind-- until it comes to you, that is. in the morning hours, he wakes at the usual time, today's schedule the first recollection as he ponders the most efficient way to go about his tasks. he opens his eyes, determined to set off in yet another hectic day, but there is something that throws him for a loop, catches him entirely off-guard :

you, who rests comfortably in his arms, the warmth of your body felt against his.

alhaitham blinks once, twice, tries to rid of the haze of exhaustion. he's fortunate you're still sleeping; you surely would have laughed at that flicker of surprise that you so rarely see from him.

ah, he remembers now, remembers how you fell asleep in the peaceful silence as he read his book, free hand idly tracing circles into your skin.

in this moment, he recognizes something like a belonging, so he smiles a gentle smile, presses a kiss to your temple.

at this rate, he may as well ignore his plans, sleep in just a little bit more. perhaps this decision will result in chaos in the long run, but you are very much worth it, after all.

you always are.

↬ xiao ࿐ ࿔

a yaksha knows of his role and what his life is destined for : a protector of liyue, conqueror of demons, a burial site for evils and grief alike. xiao is careful to keep his distance from you, the mortal life something he has never been meant to know of. but you are stubborn and relentless in your endeavors, and so you force your way into a reserved and seemingly cold heart, know that despite the corruption beneath it all, there is still a kindness and innocence that thrives in ways untold.

xiao does not think he understands loneliness. not at first, not until your constant and insistent presence.

it almost feels right, the binding of souls, the string that connects you. it almost feels as if he was meant to be at your side : your guardian, your sword and shield, your forevermore.

"i think," you begin, voice hardly above a whisper as you gaze upon liyuu from wangshu inn, "we are bound somehow, xiao." you cast a glance in his direction, a gentle affection surfacing in his eyes. "that wherever you go, i am meant to go, as well."

and a yaksha who knows only of desolation feels something beat so furiously in his chest, breath hitched and an unfamiliar exhilaration racing through his blood. he forces his gaze away, such words of affection almost too cruel. he laces his fingers with yours, and though you cannot see him when he speaks, you hear the smile in his voice.

"i belong to you." he tells you, squeezing your hand ever so gently. "wherever you go, i will follow."

↬ wanderer ࿐ ࿔

& a wanderer has lost himself in the burials of misery and memory, a bitter existence lost in a forever, reinvigorated and reincarnated into something of sorrows and a spark of redemption. something aches in the depths of a puppet, and he does not think it is the heart -- but he is not sure, in truth -- should he ever have one, would he recognize that pain? the sorrow?

would he recognize anything, he wonders?

( and he knows the answer, he does. because he knows of rage and wrath and ruin, knows what it is like to experience abandon and bitterness and everything horrid. but he cannot fathom the idea of feeling something kind, something akin to joy. peace. love. )

love-- it is not something he quite recognizes, but it is something he is beginning to understand, especially in the midst of your presence. he does not know why the feeling blooms in his chest, fills the hollows of once was, and as much as he tries to fight it, he knows that you have made your way into his newfound life, deems you as someone he cannot bear to lose.

the way his name leaves your lips is both a blessing and curse, he thinks -- the gentleness in your voice, the faint curiosity that lingers because of the flush of pink that adorns his features.

no, perhaps he does not entirely understand love yet-- but in the way your hands cup his face, a smile blooming on the curve of your lips, he knows that he will soon know its true meaning.

↬ childe ࿐ ࿔

ask childe where his home is and he will tell you high tales of his hometown : the bitter coldness, the fondness found in mischievous siblings, and memories of abyss and beyond. ask childe where his home is and he will tell you a thousand things, because truthfully, he feels that he cannot find it, not anymore. but with you, there is a feeling reminiscent of a home away from home.

"do you miss it? your home?"

childe hums, feigns deep thought. should home be defined as somewhere one deeply yearns for, a place where one thrives and feels a connection to, there are many places he deems as such. whether it is the place he grew up or the place where he learned of survivals and bloodlust and a lingering madness, he is unsure.

"often, i do." he admits, throws you a cheeky grin. but there is something in his voice that is genuine and superficial all at once -- you cannot place it, though, and somewhere in your heart, you wonder what he truly thinks and where he is truly thinking about.

he sees that hesitation, that semblance of grief that adorns your features. it's hard to catch, but he knows you all too well, and he knows it isn't because you mourn his longing. it's because you know him just as well, because you know what his answer means.

"don't worry." he tells you, a gentle smile resting on the curve of his lips as he holds your hand. he squeezes it, gentle, smile growing when you squeeze it back. "you're my home too, you know?"

↬ zhongli ࿐ ࿔

oh, how the ages have passed, the days gone by a blur. in the life of a higher being, there is much sorrow to be found and recognized. in the life of a higher being, zhongli understands feelings all too well : how they dwell so deeply in the heart of a dragon, settle in the depths of an old spirit, unable to seek their way out. how he carries a lifetime of memories with him, the remnants of those he has lost and loved a forever in his mind.

zhongli knows of haven, knows it to be many places all at once. his heart belongs everywhere he has ever existed, and in this present time, it knows you to be harbor.

the scent of tea fills a silent air, breaks his focus. you pour it, cautious, place it gently before him and take a seat by his side. many a time you have found him deep in thought, a lingering loneliness in the air ; in these moments, you dare not disrupt him, only seeking his company in silence. you rest your head on his shoulder, hand gently placed over his.

it is a very tranquil thing, this feeling of serenity. he smiles a blithe smile, knows that he will remember the comfort that is you for many lifetimes to come.

( there are many places he recognizes as refuge, zhongli thinks, the floral scent and your warmth enveloping his senses, and you are the most important one. )

[binah-beloved]

Intertwining Threads

Binah x Reader Lobotomy Corporation Pronouns: Gender Neutral Warnings: Descriptions of blood and torture

~ * ~

The life of an Arbiter revolves around torture, as is fit of the prime assassins of the Head. Whatever is ordered shall be done, they all had vowed at the start of their service; threats, collection, removals, extermination. It’s all part of the cycle. There’s nothing to be done or changed, so why not relish in the destruction? Garion was no different, her hands stained with blood and the countless lives she had torn apart. Even when she was gutted and splintered, laid out in a chair to have her brain picked and prodded; when she was forced to cling to her dying breath, listening to every crack of bone with iron red dripping from her mouth; when her name was taken away and replaced by something dull and false so he could control her better, she remained the same, as an Arbiter mimics the City. Binah. What a fitting name. Meaning to contemplate, to understand. She could do nothing but think, after all, being locked away beside a well of madness, alone. Yes, she had much time to contemplate, her task of drawing water slowly driving her insane, as there was no one who could do this but her, no one else who could withstand it. This was her punishment, for everything. Hah, punishment. An Arbiter being tormented instead of doing the tormenting. How laughable. The people around her come and go, living and dying and returning with each new cycle. She’s the head of some department or another, except she can’t leave, not ever. The doors were barred and shut for her, for all of them, long ago.

The agents and clerks beneath her always await her instructions. She used to purposefully lie, watching with sharp eyes as they fell screaming to the monsters or the sounds or the images flashing across their eyes. But he disliked that, sending her back to the room with the well and making her draw more and more water as a form of discipline, and soon she found no joy in watching people crumble, only boredom. They all call her Binah. But she’s not Binah, she’s Garion, and will be Garion forevermore. It’s difficult to tell the time down here amongst the machines and shadows. The only signs are any new employees, fools who join the ranks of the facility because they are very stupid or very desperate, or perhaps a bit of both. She’s long since given up the need to remember any of them; all her energy is spent maintaining the last threads still attached to her sanity, the ones that never seem to snap even when she wants them to. Perhaps that’s another layer of this punishment, to be forced to bear it with lucid eyes. The Arbiter feels nothing when an Abnormality breaches containment, sitting and listening to the shouts and cries for a few moments before getting to her feet. A fight would be a welcome break from the well, anyway- even at her weakest she’s still a formidable opponent for even the worst creatures from the depths. But perhaps staring into the waters has made her sloppy, her skill degrading along with her mind, because the Abnormality is only caged after a long gash is opened on her arm, the blood dripping thickly onto the floor. She exhales. There is no pain. She is an Arbiter, after all, unafraid and strong.

Yet it still stings and burns. “Binah!” A voice rings out and her eyes open with a slight jolt. The sound is vaguely familiar, something heard in passing and no more, but somehow it feels different- concerned, frantic, warm. Her head tilts in its direction, gaze landing upon one of the more recent hires assigned to her department, looking worried and a little fearful at the sight of her blood. You fuss over her wounded arm and she can do nothing but let you, staring blankly as she’s pushed in the direction of the medical bay, the other agents scattering and the memory of your voice filling her head. Binah. It was so gentle, the way you said it- But she’s not Binah. She’s Garion. But who is Garion now, after being chained to an endless web of madness and despair? Nothing but an empty husk. The Head of Extraction has begun to linger near you once working hours are over. You’re often the only ones left in the main room at that hour, your pen constantly scratching against whatever file you’re currently working on, and she remains a short distance away, watching carefully. Occasionally you can smell the tea she drinks, your lips twitching into a smile at the lighthearted thought of your Sephirah truly enjoying something before there’s the sound of footsteps and a light clink as she sets her teacup on the table beside you and asks that you do not mind her sitting so close.

You blink, looking up from your papers and into those dull black eyes, and you smile. Her heart thumps once, merely humming and taking a sip of her tea to disguise her surprise. It’s easier around you, being locked in the depths. The few strands of her sanity become stronger, untangling themselves and weaving into an organized display in your presence- how? You must have some secret ability, some tool used to manipulate the senses, for not even bloodshed and slaughter could make her feel so warm. And your voice, when you speak that name she’s been given- ah, she almost feels like she could smile. Almost. Not quite, but almost. The sight of the Extraction Sephirah and a certain employee becomes commonplace; some even call you her favorite, but when you ask she merely tilts her head, a faint glint in her usually cold eyes, and presses a finger to her lips. It was only natural for him to notice, for the change in her behavior to catch his gaze and hold his attention in an iron grip tight enough to make him panic. You’re the cause of this- some random, low-level employee who gave a fragmented Arbiter a spark- and with rage in his voice he threatens her and you in one sentence, scrambling for some semblance of control. Her eyes narrow almost imperceptibly, the air seemingly dropping a few degrees from her flat, icy stare. She is strong, can handle any torture or agony or suffering- but you are fragile, a bird she wants to cup in her palms and whisper her sorrows to and keep safe, safe for as long as you live and as long as you breathe. Her own blood she is willing to see spilled, but not yours. Never yours.

She is Garion- … No. She is Binah. That’s right, you called her Binah. She is Binah, a broken, useless shell of an Arbiter- and yet you say her name as if she’s a star in the night sky, bright and beautiful, giving her hope and warmth. So she is Binah, and it’s her own name, not for anyone to control. And Binah, the ex-Arbiter, speaks to him in a smooth, cold voice. “You will not hurt them, for I shall go mad if you do. The insanity that creeps into my skull and eats away at my senses is only restrained by an Arbiter’s will. It can and will crumble at any moment, within the blink of an eye, and the world will turn to blood and dust. So you will not hurt them. You cannot, unless your wish is to lose everything.” Binah. To contemplate, to understand. Yes, now, finally, she understands.

[basedkikuenjoyer]

Today I wanna take a break, because it is Pride Month and we lost an icon sadly far, far too quietly. Made me realize I don't think I've really heard much about Lynn Conway in queer circles for a long time. And honestly? That's fucked. If anyone deserves to be held up as a trans luminary of the past century it's her. I wish I had the knowledge of computer chips to fully explain how landmark her contributions were in her career, but truth is her story as a trans woman is what's truly fascinating.

If I have the details right, tried to transition during college in the 50s but ran into hurdles. Then got a job at IBM, fired when she sought out Harry Benjamin (another important name y'all need to quit glossing over) and was one of his patients in the late 60s. Transitioning before 30 and if I may say, being quite attractive...even when I was coming out in the 00s the general wisdom was if you could go "stealth" and just start over you should. Which Lynn did. Then went on to make some groundbreaking waves in computer chip design and really had this hellacious 30-year career as just a woman breaking barriers in tech. Keep in mind no one knew she was trans, ain't no way she'd have ended up working with Reagan's DoD on some Cold War defense tech if that was public knowledge.

Then at the end of her career, a new chapter began. Got out ahead of realizing some people were about to make the connection to her time at IBM so came out publicly through a website I remember being a pivotal find in my own journey. It was one of the best collection of resources out there and her story was one of the first ones I saw where you could transition and not be stuck in some small box forevermore because of it. You can shrug off the blowback and get on with your life. Ever heard of Blanchard & Bailey, the Autogyneophilia guys TERFs love to quote? Conway was a prominent academic speaking out against their dodgy methodology as well. Her lengthy and through takedown of that Man Who Would Be Queen book is fuckin legendary. Honestly, if you can find the old archived pages from her website it's worth a read. We don't really have many stories of like, a long life after transition without also being a mainstay of the community the whole time. There's a lot she'd get roasted for today, but generally for the wrong reasons because holy shit is my revisit showing so much honesty and stuff I've needed to hear at a similar point. We get so focused on the actual coming out and exploring and transitioning phase people miss that's just the baby steps on a lifelong journey. I miss how straightforward this old guard could be. In my experience queer youth today love it but it will absolutely enrage the late-blooming final wave of my own generation who lack so much perspective on how little the difference makes at this point.

I know it's fun to raise up queer names who were outlaws and radicals, everyone loves the (false) story of Marsha Johnson throwing the first brick at Stonewall more than her tireless decades of boring organizing. We like our fabulous and festive faces, but honestly...younger generations of trans folk should probably pay a little more attention to stories like Lynn Conway's where we actually do sometimes get to just have a "normal" and highly successful bulk of our lives after the identity struggle. So far ahead of her time it took until my own generation for us to see the whole having an experience more like hers.

[lilacartsmadsion]

And finally, the last of the gods in my ‘That Time I adopted a god AU’

The Nameless One

Most Commonly Known: God of Light.

Other least common domains: Day, Dawn, Sun, Life, Healing, Virtues, Penance, Wonders, Peace, Resolution, Miracles, Beginnings, Life Powder, Soulstones, Adventure, Reincarnation, Rebirth, Enlightenment, Harmony, Reason, Courage/Bravery,Boundaries, Rescue, Care and Mercy.

‘Praise Thee the one chosen by the Witch of Light. Born from the Iron and Flames, Casted into Horror, the blinding might of He who bares No Name. For when the Witch Fortuna baked him, she made the grave mistake of gifting his dough with Life Powder. In her last dying breath, The Witch of Light gifted this brave Cookie, the power to slay even the might of gods. Through his power were the Witches Defeated and Casted away into the far lands beyond Earthbread.’

‘With the four gods by his side, The Nameless One spoke to Earthbread with the good news, freeing us from the lies which the Witches spoke. He gifted the Cookies so that the frail and mistreated may have a chance to nurture and grow’

‘The Power of the Soul Jam resonates with the Might of the gods and blessed by Chosen Heroes did they give. The Light of Passion, a imitation of the ever-Ethreal Goddess of Love, The Light of Truth, a reflection of the Apoditic God of Wisdom, The Light of Abundance, a mirror of the Glorious Goddess of Fun, The Light of Freedom, the dawning shadow of the Abysmal God of Night and The Light of Resolution, the Very essence of The Nameless One himself’

‘With these 5 he proclaimed the glory of Earthbread, now and Forevermore’

Popular Places of Worship: Vanilla Kingdom, Ginger Kingdom and Beast-Yeast.

Symbols of Worship: Candy Cane, Magic Candy + Candy Cane, Head Piece, Diamonds, Circles and Soulstones.

————————————-

Inspirations for his design:

Yep…I had to pull an Elder Faerie again. But to be fair I was running out of ways to make Gingerbrave’s clothes. The transparency of his sleeves however is mostly Affogato. Another cookie I forgot to add is that background priest Cookie in the Dark Cacao Kingdom Update.

So yeah- Gingerbrave Absorbed the Witch of Light. And yeah he created the Soul Jam in this AU.

Again the reason why I don’t correlate Gingerbrave with PV is because none of PV’s Soul Jam traits suit Gingerbrave. (Knowledge, Deceit and Truth are all variants of PV’s Soul Jam) PV’s Soul Jam more-or-less correlate to Wizard who in this AU is the God of Wisdom. Gingerbrave mostly correlates to DCA’s Soul Jam, which is Resolution (Hence why Dark Cacao’s the one adopting Gingerbrave)

For the Soul Jam, the explanation as to why DCA and PV’s aesthetics don’t match their own gods/their main gods (DCA’s Kingdom worships/respects Dozer whereas PV’s Kingdom worships/respects Gingerbrave) It’s because of the whole ‘Beast Cookie thing’ (Hence why the Ovenbreakers look similar/are correlated to the Original Beasts.)

Gingerbrave is also not called Gingerbrave in this AU, this is somewhat following Witch’s Castle Lore where Gingerbrave got his name after the gate/hallway thingy mentioned him being a brave Cookie. In this AU Gingerbrave doesn’t even name himself so Wizard and many others just kept calling him ‘Nameless’ hence why he has the ominous title ‘The Nameless One’

The explanation above, serves as an explanation as to why Dark Cacao didn’t recognize Gingerbrave at first. Because well- Gingerbrave used the name ‘Gingerbrave’ when he dropped down to Earthbread.

Now- I’ll just have to make like- a full-scale design of them… *Sigh*

[vidavalor]

The two lines from S1 that foreshadow temporarily memory-zapped Aziraphale in S3... and a very romantic story

S2 ends with their last words to one another being "I forgive you" and the "don't bother", right? But back in S1-- in the scene that parallels the bookshop breakup at the end of S2-- Crowley self-deprecatingly declared himself unforgivable in Aziraphale's eyes/God's eyes/sometimes his own eyes and he owned it. Declared it. He's damned, he's a demon, it's what he is... Aziraphale needs to deal with it... only... it's *how* he did it that is the foreshadowing.

The "Unforgiveable" and the "I forgive you"s connect the scenes together but it's that back in S1, Crowley declared himself "unforgivable" in a lyrical parody, done spoken-word to the rhythm of Nat King Cole's famous song...

Not "Unforgiveable" but... "Unforgettable..."

Unforgettable, that's what you are Unforgettable, though near or far Like a song of love that clings to me How the thought of you does things to me Never before has someone been more

Unforgettable in every way And forevermore (and forevermore) That's how you'll stay (that's how you'll stay) That's why, darling, it's incredible That someone so unforgettable Thinks that I am unforgettable too

No, never before has someone been more

Ooh, unforgettable (unforgettable) In every way (in every way) And forevermore (and forevermore) That's how you'll stay (that's how you'll stay)

That's why, darling, it's incredible That someone so unforgettable Thinks that I am unforgettable too

All Gabriel could remember on his own after he lost his memory was Buddy Holly's "Everyday", symbolic of his love for Beezelbub. Odds are high a memory-zapped Aziraphale could remember "A Nightingale Sang in Berkeley Square". In S2, our foreshadowing king Crowley even unintentionally foreshadows it with that line that's broken us all to bits...

No nightingales in Heaven-- as in, he and Aziraphale can't be together if Aziraphale goes there-- but the scene by S3 might also be read as foreshadowing that when Aziraphale went up to Heaven, they took from him the metaphorical nightingales-- his memories of who he is and of Crowley and their relationship-- but they can't take it entirely. They can take Aziraphale's sense of self but they can't take away entirely his ability to remember Crowley. Something-- likely of the nightingale variety--can trigger it back. Aziraphale literally loves Crowley too much to ever fully forget him and that love for him might be how he can come back to remembering himself as well...

... because long before The Book of Life and Amnesiac!ArchangelFuckingGabriel and ObviouslyMemoryWiped!Muriel and confirmation that Crowley's pre-Fall memory is spotty, foreshadowing for Aziraphale losing his memory as a story was already there back in S1 when Crowley spoken-word-parodied the most famous and beautiful song in existence about being unable to forget the eternally memorable love of your life.

Unforgettable. That's what Crowley is.